I dont even know how to start this... Lets start back in a couple months ago. So when I first wrote the chapter in this book called Lewis, a lot was going on. Since then he spent the next month and a half making my life a living hell. I went to the counselor about it 4 times, his parents one, and then flat out cussing him out to get him to stop. It took me four months to finally start dating again. Remember he dumped me, but when I started dating again he became an asshole again. So much so i went to the counselor again. He stopped, thank god, then life went to hell again. I've been trying to juggle a million things school, chores, getting a job, visitations, homework, taking care of a dog, helping with my brother, and the whole 'I still love Lewis and hate myself for it' issue. Plus my stepdad is trying to stop smoking which makes him pissy, and he yells at me for everything. Which is pissing me off. My older brother just came home from college and he can be a complete ass to me cause he can.
Plus now I have to study for finals, so I have study group Mondays and Wednesdays. I normally hang out with my friend on Wednesday, but because of study group I cant as much. We dont get to see each other much anymore, cause when we are at school shes either always on her phone, or Sean (my ex, who used to be a friend to both of us) is always being an ass and taking all her attention. On the bus ride home either one of us isn't there, or she spends it complaining. On Mondays and Wednesdays im not on the bus, and on Fridays she isn't.
So today, Saturday may 18th 2019, she was suppose to come sleep over. Then at the last minute canceled, cause she 'forgot' and needed some 'time alone'. I know this seems dramatic but after everything with Lewis, even things I didn't tell you, I dont know who I can trust anymore. I dont even trust myself anymore after him. So I dont know what to do, I might just avoid her, giver her 'time alone' all the time.
Okay rant over, I know I can imagine everyone rolling their eyes cause im dramatic. But I dont think I can handle being hurt or left again. Not after everything that happened with Lewis.
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helpful stuff to know
Non-Fictionpeople struggle with a lot of problems and need help but are scared to ask for it. I am too. so I thought having a book like this out might help. so this is some helpful things to know about that. so if you struggle with any problem or know some one...
