Louder

Chapter 9

     I was singing Turning Tables by Adele as I held my phone and watched the crowd through it. Serena was up on stage, pretending to sing her heart out and the crowd seemed mesmerized by her. No one spoke, no one moved, and all eyes were on her. I stared at them, amazed by the affect Serena had on them.

     Scanning the crowd, I took in how how many familiar faces were there. Serena had fans and every day more and more people were coming to her Saturday shows to watch her sing. And the same was happening at school. Serena had found new friends and she was hanging out with them more than she hung out with Liam and I. She was loving the new attention and although I was happy for her, something felt off. I couldn't pinpoint it, but something about the situation left a sense of dread within me.

      But knowing I was overthinking it, I pushed my thoughts away and belted out the last chorus. And as soon as Serena's eyes moved to the side of the restaurant, Liam moved the camera to face Carson who stood there. I stared at him, touched by how he still looked in awe of Serena. After months of watching her sing, he still seemed amazed by her and it left my eyes softening at the sight, knowing he had fallen for her.

      And to my surprise, I couldn't help but wonder if Carson would look the same if it was me standing up on the stage. I couldn't help but wonder if the crowd would react the same if it was me in Serena's place. Finishing off the last line of the song, I watched the crowd roar with applause and give Serena a standing ovation, and once again I couldn't help but wonder. 

      Shaking my head, I told myself that Serena had a presence that I couldn't live up to. Although it was my voice, it was also Serena's stage presence that left the crowd loving her. Serena was confident and a natural on stage, and I knew I could never be what she was. Because of that, I sighed lightly and reminded myself that there was no way I'd enjoy being in Serena's spot.

*****

      I was sitting with Liam at one of the tables of Vandos. We were eating nachos in silence and suddenly, we heard Serena squeal. We whipped our heads to look at her as she sprinted to our table.

      "Guess what!" she exclaimed.

      "What?" Liam asked.

      "Carson asked me on a date!"

     My eyes widened and Liam seem caught off guard. The both of us stared at her for a second, unable to speak.

     "Aren't you happy for me?" Serena said, frowning when we didn't say anything.

     "Yeah," I said, snapping out of my daze. "Wow, this is like a dream come true for you."

      "It is! I can't believe it."

     I couldn't believe it either. It seemed like it was yesterday when Carson and Serena met, and I was surprised Carson had now asked her out. Although I knew he had fallen for her, a small part of me had hoped that maybe, he hadn't.

      "You're invited, too," Serena said. "We didn't want our first date to be too awkward and personal, so I asked if I could bring you along."

     "Oh," I said. "Um, but wouldn't I just be awkwardly third wheeling you guys?"

     "True." Serena looked up thoughtfully. "I mean Liam can come along too, so it won't be awkward for you. Do you want to come?"

      Serena looked at Liam who had been strangely quiet. He was expressionless and I frowned because around Serena, he was rarely quiet. 

     "Sure," Liam said, shrugging. "I'll come."

     "Thanks!" Serena said, grinning. "Now you have a date too, Nivenah!"