˚* ੈ✩‧₊ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒃𝒔𝒐𝒍𝒖𝒕𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒔𝒕 ⋆ 𝒇𝒊𝒏

fourteen

"how did you sleep?" billy questions his neighbor as they walked to school. autumn shrugs, "good, i suppose. how about you?" this was a lie, and the boy knew it. "decent. i was up trying to write an ode, but i still have nothing." he says. autumn yawns, bringing her right hand up to her face to cover her mouth. billy slows his walking. "can we walk slowly? i don't want to be at school yet." he asks, stopping. autumn tilts her head and furrows her brows in confusion. billy's eyes are soft, almost deer like. "sure, billy. are you okay?" the girl questions, earning a nod from billy as the begin their slow journey. they walked silently, but comfortably.

"autumn?" billy asks. "thank you for helping with my schooling. it means a lot." autumn smiles at the boy before looking down at her gloved hands. her cheeks warm to a slight rose color. billy had shown autumn his other side, the part of him only jane and prissy knew. however, she knew his act at school wouldn't change. their classmates were the ones who only knew his dark side. "you're welcome, billy." she says as they slowly come upon the dreaded destination. billy looked at her and smiled.

he admired her fair skin, and the way her hair framed her face. he admired how her eyes seemed to be even lighter in the cold. the tip of her a nose was a light pink due to the frigid air. her lips were paler than usual, separated as she let out small exhalations just to watch her breath. "billy, look! i'm a dragon!" she exclaims, letting out a breath she had held for two seconds. he chuckles, shaking his head as they walk up the steps to the school house. "josie'll have your head if we walk in at the same time, you go ahead. i'll wait out for a little." the boy says, standing in front of autumn, her being much shorter than him. "i don't care about what josie thinks, or anyone." she shrugs, looking up at the boy who didn't dare meet her eyes. his were glued to his feet, no words dared to escape his mouth. "oh, i see." autumn says sadly. he cared. her hand wraps around the door handle, he steps away so that he's out of sight. she slowly opens the door, welcoming the warmth as she entered.

of course he cared. his reputation obviously meant a lot to him and he wasn't going to let a silly girl ruin that. autumn did not understand why she was so upset over it, she claimed she didn't care. so why did she secretly feel as though her heart had dropped to her stomach? why was she fighting off tears? why did she want to see him again? to have him apologize and comfort her? perhaps she was so used to his kindness, so much that she had forgotten her place in his life. a nobody. someone to pick on. to him, she was nothing but a girl.

oh, how she was wrong. billy sat outside on the stairs, his head in his hands. angry at himself, he holds his breath. he cared about the autumn, and had grown far too close than expected. how could he hurt her like that? what was she thinking at that moment? what was he thinking? why hadn't he answered? yes, he cared about how he was viewed by his peers. and yes, he intended to keep his reputation. but he didn't mean to hurt her. the way he felt towards her, for some reason, was his favorite feeling. the amount of how much he cared for her was overwhelming. he wanted to protect her, to be there for her when she needed him. had he lost her? had he lost her trust? what could he do? how could he fix it?