my jewel ; chancheol

f o u r ; seungcheol

    I wake up with my arms empty, Chan having escaped from them at some point. My mind recalls all that happened the night before and I feel my face flush. He has to be my soulmate, I think to myself. When I touched his Jewel it was . . . amazing in a way only for soulmates. My mind is cluttered with so many unanswered questions, questions Chan has to have answers to that I don't. Answers that I may never have. It also explains why I'm so needy to have him cuddle with me more.

    Before I have the chance to dwell on my feelings for him much longer, I notice that his covers are laid neatly on top of me and there's a sticky note on his pillow. I push the feelings of confusion and want and almost sorrow to back of my head and reach for the note, curious as to what it might say.

    Had to help mom with breakfast. Come down when you're ready! :) I shake my head fondly, almost clearing my racing mind. It's just like old times. Whenever I would stay over for a sleepover, he and his mom would make a glorious meal that could feed a village. I always found it comforting, but I couldn't help but compare it to the tale of Hansel and Gretel, wondering if they were only trying to fatten me up to keep me here with them.

    I change into the clothes I was wearing the night before. Chan must've washed them since they smell like his laundry detergent. It's quite comforting. The smell of Chan, that is. It's nostalgic and always brings good memories to mind, though now I suppose there's a double meaning behind it.

    I make my way downstairs, wondering what they could have made for breakfast. I'm greeted with the sight of Chan in an apron with a cat pattern on it pulling out a tray of muffins from the oven, and, for the first time in my life, I'm nervous to talk to Chan. What if I'm offensive, or crass, or just annoying, or–

    "Are you okay?" The sudden image of Chan so close to me brings all the redness back to my face, and I can only think of how embarrassing I must look.

    "I-I'm fine," I stutter as I take a step back from him. "I was just drowsy is all."

    I know this doesn't fool him, but he chooses not to question me any further. I take a seat at the table and fidget with my fingers, waiting for Chan to finish whatever he's doing. "Do you want a muffin? I made your favorite," he asks as he puts a blueberry muffin in front of me as an offer.

    I nod and take his muffin, careful not to touch his hand. "Actually, Channie," I call (and suddenly I realize how strange it is for me to call him 'Channie'), "can you put this in a bag or something? I'm not super hungry now, so I'll just eat it in class."

    He nods and takes the plate with the muffin from in front of me. While he finishes cleaning up with his mom, I head back upstairs to his room to find my backpack as well as his. It's strange; now that I've come to realize that Chan may very well be my soulmate I find that everything smells a lot more like him. The sweet scent of him is almost tittering on too much, but it's just . . . perfect.

    I rush back downstairs to find Chan sitting in his favorite chair, waiting as patiently as a dog. Seungcheol, you should never call anyone a dog, much less your soulmate, I scold myself. My soulmate. Soulmate.

    "Cheollie, are you okay?" Chan asks in a concerned voice. "Your face is all red and you keep spacing out. Maybe you shouldn't go to school today. What if you have a fever?"

    "No, it's nothing," I lie to him, feeling a queasy churning in the pit of my stomach, like I've done something bad. "I'm just having an off morning is all! You don't have to worry about me, just let me take care of you, 'kay?" I ruffle his hair, making sure my hand doesn't betray me by lingering for even a second too long. I hand him his backpack and we leave the house, making sure to say a fair well to his mother.

Thankfully the walk to the school helps my mind calm down considerably. We reach the school after only a few minutes of walking. I decide to be a gentleman and walk him to his classroom. I hand him the lunch his mother made for him last minute and leave him alone with his classmates, giving his hair one last tousle. As I walk toward the door, though, I can hear one of his friends teasing him, asking if I'm his boyfriend or 'sugar daddy'. I feel a strange feeling linger in the pit of my stomach as a smile graces my lips.

———

"Do you like Chan?" Jeonghan asks as soon as I sit next to him for the class right before lunch. He seems bored with the lesson already, playing with his long hair instead of finishing the worksheet the teacher's handed out. He doesn't even look up at me for my answer. Instead he sits back smugly and says, "I knew it."

    "Shut up, I don't," I shove at him, though he only rolls his eyes like he already knows my secret. Jesus Seungcheol, you don't even know for sure if Chan is actually your soulmate, I chastise myself silently. I shouldn't be assuming anything so important.

"Look," I whisper, "he's just a friend. He's like a brother to me."

"So you have a thing for incest?" Jeonghan asks, though he knows I'm not. I pinch his arm harshly, trying not to be too rough but enough to make him yelp. We continue with our lesson, though Jeonghan sees it more as a time to pester me with his questions.

    "Are you sure you don't have any feelings for Chan? Like, at all?" he asks as we walk to lunch.

    We walk up to the lunch line to get our food, though Jeonghan said he already has a lunch. "I really don't, okay? And even if I did it would never work out."

    "What are you even talking about, you two are practically made for each other. Who knows, maybe you're soulmates." I don't say anything back, finding the dessert options much more intriguing than his silly claim.

    "I'm just saying that I highly doubt you could resist having any feelings for him, especially with how much you two hang out," he says as we walk to our table and take a seat. It's strange but I feel a churning in my stomach when I see that Chan has chosen to sit with Hansol today. I probably just like talking to him, like the other day.

    Jeonghan follows my gaze and scoffs. "'No feelings at all', huh? Whatever, I'm gonna go sit with Joshuji again. Should I tell Hansol and Chan to sit here?"

    I break eye contact with him to look at my food, pushing it around in a sulky manner, and say, "If you want."

    "Jesus, you're just like a little kid." He leaves and whispers something to Chan before going to his other friend, his 'Joshuji'. Suddenly, Chan looks back at me, and for whatever reason I wanna hid my face, or look away, or something so that I'm not looking at him. But instead I wave because, as I've said, I have no romantic feelings for Chan at all, so what reason do I have to hide? My red cheeks might make a compelling argument.

    He walks over (sadly, bringing Hansol along with him) and he takes the seat next to me. Hansol sits across from him and greets me. I've always liked Hansol. He's not a bad kid once you get to know him, he's just had a lot of bad things happen to him that influence his bad choices. If he really tried, he could be a genuinely good person and an equally amazing soulmate.

    "Seungcheol," Chan calls to me while waving his dainty hand in front of my face. "Stop spacing out so much, we came over to talk with you, ya know!" He giggles after speaking, and I hate how happy it makes me.

    "Sorry," I say, and I have an urge I for some reason can't suppress. So I go with it. I take Chan's hand that's under the table and hold it. We've done this before without hiding it, but it feels different now. It feels . . . special. And I know Chan feels it too, if his red cheeks weren't enough of a hint. It's nice, I think, to be so happy from something so simple.

——
okay so im kinda the worst for not updating and im really really sorry about that fjhdjdlsl ill try to update much more! also im thinking of putting dates throughout the stories? like at the beginning of every chapter ill put the day cause i feel like the timeline is getting confusing but if that sounds dumb to you guys i won't do it.. anyway thank you all for being so patient and supportive of my very long break uwu it means a lot to me