Angels Of Hope

Chapter 38

I'm in love with him.

He never leaves my mind, he's always there; mentally if not physically. It's just incomprehensible. He's my one stable force, my one stability in a world filled with chaos and I so desperately need that in my life. I love him so much for that. I’m in love with him and I can’t believe I’ve only just realised it.

This feeling is so strange; it stretches throughout my whole body. It’s overwhelming, yet makes me feel complete. It has no bound nor length nor depth; it’s just absolute. It feels as though I’m in a dangerous fire, yet I’m completely safe at the same time. It feels as though someone’s given me peace. It feels as though my heart is dancing around my chest; and a hole, I was never aware was there, has been filled. I feel so light, like I’m on top of the world yet my heart is constricting and it feels as if there’s no oxygen in my lungs.

I am in love with your soul not your body. Your temperament is what lures me into you. Your deep soothing voice is what I crave for and your warmth is what I covet. When you smile at me it seems as if the whole world is mine. When our eyes exchange looks it feels as if everything has paused and belongs right in its place. Your mesmerising oceanic eyes have locked themselves in my mind and only thoughts about you mingle in my head. These feeling I have for you are stronger than just admiration, I think I am falling for you hard, like the falling of stars.

It’s strange – frightening even – how you can go from someone being a complete stranger, to then being completely infatuated by them and wondering how it ever was that you were able to live without them, because you sure as hell couldn’t imagine being without them now. I know we’re only young, and most people would consider me to be foolish and naïve, but it’s true when I say that I love him more than I could ever love myself. He’s my best friend and, as cheesy as it sounds, he’s my anchor. My one stability in this world filled with chaos.

Because your love is so whole, my missing pieces appear. Because your touch carries such passion, what was scarred becomes soft once more. Because you are steady and patient, my open wounds have time to seal and vanish. Perhaps that is why they say love is such magic, this gift from the universe, this sweet addiction to the man I was born to find. For with my twin soul, the only other born in the same flame as I, we are able to bathe one other in warmth and light as easily as we breathe, immune and oblivious to darkness.