3. These Traumas We Can't See Past

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Gerard was pressed against the cave's wall, Frank cuddling his head against the older's chest. Gerard's arms were wrapped tightly around the boy's frame as they sat contentedly together. The morning air was crisp and chilly, but heat radiating from their bodies kept the pair of lovers warm, as well as the stream of light killing the darkness of the cave. The entrance was wide and round and open- for that they were both relieved. The enclosure, once a place of horror and fear, was now somewhere for the two to go to simply be alone together, a level of peace that their small town didn't provide.

"I'm so lucky." Gerard whispered into Frank's hair, not meaning to let his thoughts escape but unable to contain his swell of emotion.

"Why?"

The older smiled, "Because I'm holding someone beautiful in my arms."

Frank smiled, lifting his head to gaze into Gerard's face. He brought a single hand up, tracing Gerard's soft and curvy jaw with rose-soft fingertips that always graced the latter with a blissful amount of delicacy. "It's funny, you know?" Frank spoke.

Gerard tilted his head in curiosity. "What is, love?"

"It's funny you think this is all real."

Gerard's heart nearly stopped, and his smile instantly fell as he loosened his grip on Frank and pulled away from him by a fraction. Nerves and anxiety brushed his mind with their ravenous claws. "What?" He whimpered.

"I'm still unconscious, Gerard. This isn't real," Frank's voice grew as a petrified expression took over his features. "We aren't free. We're still trapped in that cave and it's been hours. You have to get up so you can wake me. I'm hurt deeper than you realize. You have to save us." He jumped to his feet, grabbing Gerard's arm and pulling him up as well. "If you don't get up we'll both die. We'll.. we'll never be together." Frank's gaze drifted to look behind Gerard, and when the older teenager followed Frank's stare, a gasp escaped his lips and he jumped back.

There, on the ground in complete darkness, lay Gerard himself, curled next to Frank. They weren't intertwined in an intimate or romantic way, only a foot apart like most male friends would sleep. Blood clung to the sides of their faces and dirt spotted their hair. The cave was sealed shut and there was no escape. Somehow, everything Gerard swore he had just experienced, wasn't real.  It was that thought that sent him into a soul-crushing pain, one that had his love-struck heart feeling like it was simultaneously on fire and freezing at one hundred degrees below. Suddenly, Gerard noticed the ground was getting a lot closer, but before he could react, his body collapsed onto the dirt floor, ripping him from sleep and placing him back in the real world.

Conscious once again, Gerard sat up quickly, chest heaving from the intensity of his dream. He glanced to the left to see Frank still beside him breathing shallowly, but eyelids locked shut. Gerard released a noise that was somewhere between a groan and a sob. Why was this happening? What did this all mean? He shook his head and decided it would be best to shut down his troubled thoughts and focus on waking his friend. He couldn't remain solum over a relationship that never happened.

A realization popped into Gerard's mind as he stared down at the younger boy; Frank was hurt and Gerard hadn't the slightest clue how to help him, or what was wrong with the younger teen, for the matter. He spun every memory of any doctor show he had watched or the rare occasions either himself or his younger brother, Michael, had been to the hospital. The only times Gerard could recall were when he broke his wrist at thirteen, and when Michael had H1N1, a strain of stomach flu. He couldn't see any bones that looked out of place and he figured Frank wouldn't still be asleep if it was the flu, so there had to be something else wrong. Relying on basic knowledge, he knew the cut on Frank's head should be wrapped so it didn't get infected. Gerard then remembered that his own scratch wasn't covered, but he wasn't concerned with himself at the moment.

Taking his black platform boot off, he removed his sock before pulling the boot back on. He knew it was gross, but he couldn't rip his leather jacket with his bare hands, and the plain shirt he wore was thin, so it wouldn't do much for protection against germs. Granted, his nasty footwear probably wasn't the most sanitary thing around, but it was thicker than his shirt. He scooted closer to Frank, and carefully lifted the boy's head into his lap. He took the sock and tied it around the entire vicinity of the cut, being sure it was covered. As his fingers grazed Frank's skin, he took note of how hot the younger's skin was. The cave wasn't a very warm place, so Gerard concluded Frank had a fever.

"Fuck it," He grumbled, before tearing off his jacket and laying it across Frank's torso. He moved to the other side of the boy and slowly shifted him so he was pressed into the cave's walls, the older hoping it could act as a barrier against the cold. Gerard wasn't sure why the air was so bitter, as it was late fall, and the town almost never received snow this early on. He didn't care about himself, he didn't have time for that. Frank needed him.

"Please wake up, Frankie," Gerard whispered as he sat close by to watch over his friend. "I can't help you that much if I don't know all of you symptoms... I just need you to wake up, please wake up."

Gerard was too lost in trying to hold back tears that he didn't notice the fluttering of Frank's eyelids or his clenching fingers.

"Please wake up."

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