A Place In This Life

Chapter 10

I traumatized myself by standing in front of the closet. Pants or skirt? Black? Brown? Blue? Too boring. Too many accessories. Too much to deal with when there was only an hour before school started. I wished my clothes were more colorful, but every time I actually went clothes shopping I was drawn to a lack of color.

Discarded garments were strewn across my bed. What was I going to do? I looked to the forbidden back of the closet and pulled out a hot pink swing coat I'd found in a thrift shop. Time was running out, so the pink coat went on over my black clothes. Like clockwork, Cara pulled into the driveway and started to honk.

I dashed through the house, grabbing my purse and a banana.

"Have a granola bar, too," said my mom, tossing a compressed oat puck at me. I threw the bar into my purse, reached for my commuter mug of coffee and rushed to meet Cara, who was doing her face in the rear view mirror. Her half-lined eyes surveyed my ensemble.

"Nice jacket! Where'd you get that?"

"Goodwill. Do you think it's too bright?"

"People are going to think you're someone else. I don't think anyone's ever seen you wear something other than black," she said, finishing her eyes and then batting them at me.

At school, I felt like a 150-watt bulb in a dark room. People turned their heads in disbelief that I was actually wearing something bright. I hoped that it would damage their retinas. Mr. Stankey was particularly in awe of the coat, deciding to take a 10-minute spin on how dye was made, pointing out the obvious pink of my coat and blush of my cheeks as examples of coloring philosophy.

The walk to my locker was the longest. I purposely took slow strides through the halls, taking a detour from the normal route until I saw my destination in the distance. Nobody was there, and I felt a mixed sense of relief and disappointment. With a quick flick of the dial, I opened the locker, threw my books in, and shut the door before anyone appeared.

I figured I would run into someone at lunchtime, if I was lucky. Not that I was counting on Alex to do anything other than the normal "Hi, how ya doin'?" But after Friday night, I couldn't help but feel eager that he would say something more than that.

Turning back in the other direction, I almost smashed the other side of my face into the broad chest I'd become familiar with at the party. Alex was there, his hair hanging in his eyes, coyly looking at me through the fringes. Caught in a pink coat.

"She does wear color!" he said. I gave him a half smile and looked at my feet.

"What does that mean?"

"It means that you look pretty amazing in pink. I should try wearing color sometime."

I smacked his arm with my purse to relieve my utter sense of embarrassment.

"I'm planning to take this coat and shove it in the locker, thank you," I said, starting to peel the thing off. He put his hand on the collar, preventing me from removing the pink.

"Now waiiiiit a minute. You're not thinking of reverting, are you?"

"It's too warm to wear a coat and I... look... ridiculous."

"I don't think so. It brings out the color in your face," he said. I gulped a giant air bubble, which expanded in the middle of my growling stomach. My appetite disappeared.

"Do you want to go to lunch? We can eat here and risk gastric upset, or go to Subway."

My lost my appetite was replaced with a buzzing stomach and heart that flew away the moment Alex said Do you.