Diaries of a Broke Girl

Entry #1

Summer "16

"Ladies and Gentleman this is Crenshaw High Schools class of 2016!"

One year later...

Just a year ago those were the words ringing in my ear during graduation those words let me know school is over and now the real world begins. Most of my friends are already off to college and here I am looking for jobs behind a computer screen.

Sure, I did get accepted to a number of colleges I'm no dummy but sadly I'm not a genius who got straight A's and I'm no athlete either so I didn't receive a full-ride scholarship being that's the only way I'd be able to go to college nor did I have the financial stability my mother sure didn't save any money for college. With three mouths to feed I cant say that I blame her she barely made it though the end of the month with rent, food, car note.

My mother was diagnosed with stage-two breast cancer during graduation so she hasn't been able to work or care for my sibling and here I am taking over the role of a mother and head of the household. I have one younger sibling my brother Kyle he just turned nine-years old and I have an older sister Camille she's married with kids so I barely see her these days.

I was done looking though Indeed applying for jobs I had to get ready for work without much job experience I've been only able to land entry level job positions. I work two jobs to be able to afford the rent, bills and groceries my mother lives in public housing out here in Los Angeles so our rent is $950 for a three bedroom.

The area isn't the safest but it's a place to call home I grabbed my things Kyle waited for me in the hallway he looked so adorable with his dopey-eyes and peanut butter brown skin we both are splitting images of my mother with the matching dimples.

" Cyn-a-bun, can I have $5 for lunch?" Kyle asked.

I opened my wallet handing him over a $5 bill he smiled thanking me I kissed him on the head he opened the door for me I locked up we drove my moms car we call her Faith because every block we drive I silently prey the car doesn't brake down. This car had nine lives but she's still running an old "94 Toyota Camry I just prayed for better days everyday I hated that my brother lived like this I still had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I turned the music up listening to the smooth sounds of Mary J Blige we stopped at a red light Kyle turned the music down.

" Cyn is mom gonna die?" Kyle asked

My heart dropped I looked in his little brown eyes and I didn't know what to say to him, he had this look of fear and defeat no child should be going though this losing a parent at a young age.

" Kyle, don't say that mommy is a fighter and we need her to fight.. why would you say that?" I asked.

Kyle looked though the window watching children walk along the sidewalk with their parents I knew what he was thinking.

How are these kids so lucky? why is this happening to my mom?

" Dion, got mad at me for taking his turn when we were playing kick ball he said my mommy is gonna die" Kyle said with hurt in his voice I could tell he was hurting hell I'm hurting too.

" Kyle, don't listen to him sweetie he isn't god he doesn't know if people are gonna die.. look at me" I said he turned his face to me.

" no, matter what happens we have each other Booger and I'm not going anywhere" I said.

He nodded " you called me booger" he chuckled.

Booger is a nickname I called my brother since he was a baby he'd chase me with a booger on his finger those were fond memories.. happy memories.