Gavin and Roxanne ✔️

NINE

That night, over Japanese pastries and the best taro bubble tea I've ever had, Roxanne and I sit and talk. It's more of a continuation of our lively conversation with Jeremy at Ruggiero's and nothing like the tearful recounting of our respective breakups. We're just relaxing, getting better acquainted, and enjoying each other's company – simple as that. By the time we leave, we're going back and forth like we've been best of friends for years.

We decide that what the hell, life is short, let's give this romance thing a try. I'm in charge of setting up the first date; figuring we need something casual and low-key, I settle on mini-golf and greasy burgers. It's hard to take yourself too seriously when you're trying to sink a putt into the mouth of a giant plastic pirate face. Even though it might be outside Roxanne's comfort zone, she takes it all in stride and we have a wonderful time. We end up back at her place – it's much bigger and much nicer than mine, though that's not exactly a high bar to clear – and things get physical rather quickly. We do everything we did that first night we got together – and then some. Though it barely seems possible, it's even better this time around.

We go out a few more times – a movie, a minor league baseball game, a late-night show at a jazz club downtown. The dynamic is always fun and laid-back, the conversation always easy and engaging, and somehow the sex gets more mind-blowingly incredible every time we do it. Yet though we revel in each other's company, though our bodies are perfectly in tune and we have some undeniable next-level chemistry, something's missing. Aside from that first night, when we spilled our guts to each other half-drunk, we haven't really connected on an deeper, more emotional level. I love spending time with Roxanne, I love talking with her about anything and everything, and holy shit, can I say one more time how much I love the sex? But I'm not in love with her, and I can sense – from her tone of voice, her body language, the way she looks at me – that she feels the same way.

Sometime after our fourth date, we have the difficult but inevitable conversation. In the end, it's all about what we want from life, from a partner. Me, I'm still young, I still have a bit of a wild streak in me, and I want to experience what the world has to offer. I'm not ready to settle down in a relationship quite yet, and when I am, I'd really love to have children someday. But Roxanne? She's already put down her roots; she's debt-free, financially secure, and done with the day-to-day grind of raising a family. If she's interested in a long-term relationship, she says, it'd be with someone she could spend her 'golden years' with, a man looking toward retirement, likely with children and grandchildren of his own. As fond as Roxanne and I are of one another, the futures we envision for ourselves are vastly different. And so we make the decision to go our own separate ways – at least in a romantic sense – but to remain close friends and confidants. I'll be honest, I'm a little sad about it, but I know it's the best thing for both of us.

For a while after that, we still get together regularly – often for dessert or drinks after a concert, sometimes for coffee on a lazy Sunday morning. And we may no longer be dating, but the sex is so great that we can see no compelling reason to give it up. So yes, we spend a couple of months as 'friends with benefits' – which works out extremely well for both of us. Sex for its own sake, without the drama and complex emotions that come with a serious relationship, is one of the most liberating, fulfilling experiences I've had.

But we eventually break off this arrangement as well. Roxanne starts seeing a man she meets through a dating app, a college economics professor named Charlie, who soon becomes a regular presence backstage after our concerts. He's fifty-six – okay, so maybe he's a little closer to her age than I am – and judging from the one time she introduces him to me, he's everything Roxanne needs and deserves: witty, cultured, outgoing, and a perfect gentleman who's obviously crazy about her. Most importantly – from the way they're always smiling when they're together, the way they look at each other, the way they sneak little pecks on the lips when they think no one is looking – I know they're happy.

And as her friend, I couldn't be more thrilled for Roxanne.

********

So maybe Gavin and Roxanne weren't meant to be soulmates and true loves – I'll admit I was a little bummed once I realized their fate. But I think this is an even better outcome – they both get a shot at the future they want and deserve. They'll always treasure that night together and what came of it – and they'll remain close friends for a long, long time.

One concern I had about this chapter and the ending in general: does it feel rushed? Would you like to see Gavin and Roxanne's process of dating for a bit, then realizing they need different things from a relationship, written out as part of the story instead of summarized? As a newbie writer, I'm very much open to suggestions.

Thank you as always, from the bottom of my heart, for every read, every vote, and every comment. If you haven't already, please consider *voting* – and know that I appreciate your support more than I can adequately express!