Breaking Barricades (Levi x Reader)

7. ** How to Heal **

* Song: "Omake-Pfadlib" by
Sawano Hiroyuki [Attack on Titan OST] *

I fought to keep my demons from stealing Levi's warmth from me, but the endless battle raged on within. The tender touch of his fingertips tracing my skin was met with memories of blades doing the same. My heart beat rapidly as a rush coursed through me, only to associate the same pace with panic. It felt like I was cheating my soul out of the passion Levi was offering me.

He gently allowed our bodies to fall together onto the freshly laundered sheets beneath us. His face hovered directly over mine, as he brushed loose strands of hair from my face before softly reuniting our lips.

I fought to resist the urge to mentally disappear when he sat up and hastily began removing his clothes. He paused for a brief moment, slowing his breath, as he savored the sight of me before him. We began to memorize how the moonlight traced our silhouettes, recognizing how beautifully raw we had become to each other.

I suddenly felt my anxiety build, realizing how badly he wanted me. Even though I could see his eyes begging for my approval, they also seemed to reassure me that he could wait forever. I sat up to meet him, gently bringing my forehead to his, unable to hide the tears that escaped me. Placing his hand upon my cheek, he stroked my damp skin lightly.

"(F/N), I want to be the one who gives back what those bastards stole from you. But I'm no damn different if I make you go hiding like this," Levi whispered ruefully.

I pulled back in astonishment to see shame beginning to cloud his beautiful eyes.

"Levi, you are nothing like them! It's just that... I'm so insanely terrified of not being able to give you what you want. I'm not even sure I know how to--- But I'll be damned if you're not the one who heals me!"

I felt myself retaliating against everything and everyone who had ever tortured me, finally breaking through the barricades I had so fearfully built to survive. Levi immediately recognized the fire that ignited in my eyes, and we collided furiously in a tangle of lust and desire. I felt his rugged body crash into mine, yearning to complete me. In that very moment, Levi resurrected every physical sensation I had ever buried within myself, longingly filling the void within me. With a gasp of absolute ecstasy, our broken souls fused beautifully into one.

I buried my face into his chest, biting my lip as not to unleash a euphoric scream. Noticing my reluctance to vocalize such pleasure, he began to tease me playfully by dragging his tongue lightly up my neck, before biting my ear sensually. I inhaled sharply, shivering with bliss.

I dug my nails into his back when his lips returned to my neck, this time accompanied by passionate nips. Arching my spine in rhapsody, I began to moan for mercy.  He responded by pinning my hips back down with his own, his rhythm becoming more intense.

Our limbs tangled and locked, discovering new and exciting ways to reconnect. We allowed our hands to wander and claim their newfound territory. Our bodies spiraled in unison, sharing in an everlasting dance. There were moments filled with heated passion as we discovered how to satiate our ravenous hunger. We even dangerously indulged in our most carnal desires, which of course was initiated by a devious little smirk.

Once we had climbed as high as we could, we held each other in free fall, enraptured by the perfection of our consummation.

Levi collapsed on top of me, both of us striving to catch our breath. I began stroking his back gently, as if to graciously thank him for revitalizing my faith in integrity; for proving to me that making love deviated far from the rape and abuse that I had been subjected to.

Once we had regained our composure, we basked in the glow of our intimacy. Levi planted soothing kisses along my scars, and I did the same to him.

With an agreeable sigh, he flopped his head back onto my pillow, pulling me to his side. I placed my hand on his chest and snuggled into his arms. We took a few moments to reflect on what had just transpired between us, revitalized by the sheer perfection of our harmony.

Eventually breaking the silence that followed our accomplished sighs, I whispered Levi's name, renewing our conversation. He turned to face me, a rare smile amidst his lips.

"Thank you... for everything. I can't even begin to explain what I'm feeling right now. And honestly, I never envisioned myself choosing to be with someone..."

Levi let out a "hrmph" of amusement and squeezed my shoulder gently.

"Well shit, I never thought I'd be the one asking. You did or said something that switched up my priorities; I didn't expect that..."

He paused for a moment, grappling at whether or not he wanted to say what else was on his mind, before he continued.

"It doesn't help that you're fucking mesmerizing though..."

I nuzzled into his chest, bashfully blushing at his confession. I then smiled to myself, comforted by the warmth of his skin against mine. We both began to slowly concede to the inevitable drowsiness that washed over us. Levi gingerly placed a kiss on my forehead before quietly whispering,

"Get some sleep, (F/N)."

I effortlessly complied, falling into the first peaceful slumber I could remember, safely nestled within the healing embrace of my lover.

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