"Please stop" I screamed threw tears as blood ran from my nose and lip. I knew he wasn't gonna stop so I just lay there lifeless. I always focus on one spot on the ceiling or the walls, it helps me just try to focus on something that isn't really there. After he finished he started to kick me and punch me, even for fun whoever has me cuts a line on one of my body parts its a tradition my mom told them to do. It doesn't stop im 17 and I cant even leave because my mom wont let me.
My mom won't let me leave at all she hates me, I had a twin Solange she died in a car crash with my dad and since they died she has hated me. She wishes it was me in that car instead of Solange. She was the star and I was the dust, mon always thought she was better than me. Solange and my dad stuck up for me but bow she just says she'll kill me since god mad the wrong choice.
Sometimes I wonder if there is a god because I pray everyday but yet I get stuck in the same damn position.Solange had really long hair and I did too, It went to our knees. The day of the funeral I cut it off, I think thats when she got mad because she seen that I was Beyonce and not another Solange .
I cut it when I was 16 and ever since then mom values my hair and thats it. She hates me but loves to brush my hair and play in it. I guess it reminds her of Solange in a way. My hair grows faster that Solange did so my hair is at my feet now. Its brown and honey when she sends me to the store everyone says they love my hair.
I love and value my hair, I like when people say its beautiful but why don't they ever call ME beautiful. I am not my hair I want someone to see me and nothing else. I go places and see all these people in couple. They kiss and hug, they look head over heals for eachother. I want that, I want someone to love me and say they need me.
I want someone to uplift me and see me for me, or someone to need love the way I do. I know my mom hates me and I know she wants me gone, I dont know why she keeps me around but Im getting a bad feeling.
