EPIC (Book 1 of the Soundcrush series)

Chapter 58: Rock Stars Throw Beach Parties

Kat

I wake disappointed, with no trace of Trace's warmth in our bed. He always does this...wears me out with sex. He makes me come over and over until I have to sleep, and then he bounces to do rock star business. I love that man—his chill, enduring stamina, his natural inclination to take care of everything and everyone around him. The more I get to know Matt, the more I see that he and Trace are cut from the same rough, durable fabric.

Street is more like Marianne—he has a different kind of strength. I've gotten to know him pretty well this summer—he's been home in LA from Berkely and active in Marianne's events. I like him a lot. I never met a guy like him. Most guys I've been around are like Trace or Matt—complete drivers of their situations but smart enough to talk themselves down and realize they can't always get their way. Or like Colin and Adam— a double edged sword—sweet almost always but then they flip their switch and take care of business when they need to. Or like Leed—the most dangerous kind of alpha of all—one that is so completely comfortable with himself, he doesn't even question his right to rule. Leed was born king.

Yeah, I actually relate to Street pretty well. He's more like me—the real me. He has an up-for-anything spirit, a fun kind of faith, a more limited focus on the things he cares about. He doesn't have to rule his world, like Matt and Trace, he just needs to feel like he's making a difference. But still, he's always been the oldest del Marco sibling, and he's a caretaker, like both his mother and father. I hope he and Trace don't bump against each other, over Row. Street is SoCal cool, but I don't know how he will feel about Trace taking over the big brother role.

Or maybe they will both go batshit on Riley. I sure hope my boy knows what he's about there. I can't tell after one interaction if he really likes Row, or if it's like Bodie said—if he's just found the trick to managing her-- but he's definitely running some flirtatious games there. 

And what the hell, Row? Riley doesn't seem like her normal type. She usually goes for the bad boy she can pick up and drop just as fast with no sweat off anyone's back. Riley--the smooth-talking three steps ahead spymaster is not her MO. Might not be her best play either, if she's wanting to run the show...

Then again, I can see it. She is always attracted to older guys and Riley is nearly a decade older than her. Worse than that, Riley is something very different, to Row. Not at all like these brawling, party-hard musicians she's grown up around, that probably seem like a dime a dozen to her. Yeah, I could see Row being intrigued by a guy like Riley. Maybe she's looking for a challenge.

The question is, what is Row to Riley? A difficult artist to be managed, or something more?

Well, I can't worry about that. I've got my own little difficulty to manage.

I know I have to tell Trace the whole story about my henna tattoos. I just...gah...I don't want a fight.

We've been doing so well. Ashlynn is finally behind us. Well, that's not exactly true. I've worked out most of my jealousy, and Trace has worked out feeling responsible for her, and worked out most of his anxiety that I'm going to flip and out start doing club drugs every night in LA. So, she's not a thing between us anymore, but she's still in front of us—I know eventually she's getting out of rehab and eventually I'll have to see her.

My parents are lobbying hard for a full family reconciliation. They are so on it, that they haven't even flipped out about me living in LA and deferring college for a year. Which was shocking. We'll see how they ride when I spring the news that I'm staying on the West Coast for college, instead of resuming my acceptance at Duke. I'm going to wait to make sure I get in at UCLA, before I tell them.

Only Trace knows about that plan. He tells me I'll definitely get in because of my grades and my "internship" experience. Having Marianne del Marco as a personal reference in LA means something in just about any arena. He says my Instagram fame certainly won't hurt, but I'm worried that deferring at Duke makes me look flaky, uncommitted.