Rise of the Warrior of Everfen

Chapter 33: Not Ready

They spent awhile packing while couriers set about delivering messages of the new peace treaty. The human soldiers that remained behind seemed quite at ease with the orcs, they were even having mock battles against each other in the field using wooden staves. Wren's offer weighed on her heart, her decision to go to her childhood home haunting her as much as the place itself.

Wren informed her the journey would take three or four days, as her parents' home had resided near the orc border, hence how easily they'd been attacked and brutalized. They'd been unprepared, there had been no attacks in the east until that day. Some days she still wished she could go back and save them somehow. How different would her life be if she'd been able to grow up a human?

She turned and saw Cold Hammer, Tekhana, preparing one of his clansmen's dire wolf for travel. Bukoo was not happy with being left behind, but he was still healing. Most dire wolves bonded with one person and did not easily share it's back with a different rider, but this particularly wolf was an omega, he said. They were submissive before all, friendlier, more compliant.

She had a hell of a time teasing them all about how any of their dire wolves would let her ride them. They grumbled about their wolf eating her head, but they all knew she was right. The entire pack adored her.

She sighed as she tried to rid her mind of what was coming. Somewhere ahead of her, she would face her past and what remained of a home long abandoned. Licking her lips, she faced Cold Hammer again and said, "Thank you for coming with me."

He turned and looked at her over his shoulder, "I'm not letting you out of my sight." She snorted and he made a face at her, "You're mine, I plan to keep you close." She gave him a mock eye roll but her heart was honestly leaping at those words. As if to prove his point, he reached her in two long strides and pulled her against him, crushing her in a firm embrace. "You could fight me on the matter. Isn't that how we solve all our disagreements?"

"You'd enjoy that too much." She teased and tipped her head back. She was so tempted to claim his lips but they were in view of others. She sobered and pressed her lips together, trying to remember where she was. She couldn't forget others were watching. She pulled out of his arms gently and turned to face him. "When we return, I want us to tell Lohke together. I want to wear my arm ring and I want you to wear your tusk ring for everyone to see." She fingered the arm ring which she had tucked under her sleeve instead of on the outside. He'd done as he'd suggested and made it wearable for her in quick order.

"We could do it now."

She laughed, surprised by his eagerness. She didn't answer him, just turned and finished setting her packs on Lothar's back. Everyone was nearly ready and Cold Hammer ventured back to the dire wolf he was going to be carried by.

This journey wasn't going to be easy for her and she'd asked the three people she most trusted to join her: Cold Hammer, Lohke, and Khash. Since Wren was leading them, there was no need to ask him, but she would've asked him, too. The two humans had been her support in her rejoining their culture and Lohke had long since claimed a part of her heart as her most trusted friend.

Still, she hesitated, failing to pull herself into the saddle, even as everyone else climbed onto their mounts. Guilt ticked in the back of her mind. Years after watching orcs destroy her family, she was leading them back there. She was mated to one.

Horror flicked in her heart. What if her parents were watching from the grave? What if they were disappointed and not proud? They'd been murdered by orcs and she'd gone against everything she'd ever known by falling in love with one.

"Sheobulf," she flinched as a hand settled on her shoulder and she twisted to look at Cold Hammer. He'd dismounted and walked back to her and everyone was staring at her, waiting on her.

She blinked at him, "What?"

"We've been calling your name." Concern filled his gaze and his eyes roamed her face before he squeezed her shoulder, "What's wrong?" his words were low and quiet.

"I'm not ready for this." She whispered. "I..." Tears immediately brimmed in her eyes and she didn't know where they came from or how to stop them.

The look in his eyes said he wanted to pull her to him but he didn't. Instead he took both her shoulders and said, "You're the fiercest warrior I know. You're ready for everything, anything, at anytime. Now get on your horse."

While her fears that she was somehow betraying her parents still lingered in her mind, she sniffed back her tears, not sure if she loved or hated him for his short, stern answer and command.

"I haven't been there since...you know."

"We'll get through this," his voice was even lower this time, sincere. "Together."

Those words gently warmed her heart and she tried to ignore the fear that she was betraying her parents. She sucked in a deep breath and tried to smile, "Together." She repeated and he nodded. Somewhat comforted, she turned to her horse and readjusted the saddle, but just as his hand slid away from her shoulder, she turned and grabbed it, "When we return, we tell Lohke about our union. Then Wren."

"Whatever you say."

She cocked an eyebrow at how easily he agreed. "Really?"

He laughed, "I told you, I'll have only one mate in my life, but until we publicly adorn each other with rings, no one knows the truth but us. You could change your mind. I don't want to give you any reason to leave me now-" she smacked his arm with an open hand and he flinched back and laughed out loud enough that anyone nearby would've heard it.

"You're not funny. I'm not leaving you."

Tusks bared in a large smile, he said, "Good."

A sharp whistle interrupted their laughter and she saw Ghorg nearby gaping at them. The others were still waiting and several of the king's men and Lohke's band were riding with them, but he was the only one staring. The others were just talking to each other with low voices.

"What did you say to him?" Ghorg demanded. "I've never heard him laugh so."

Cold Hammer went abruptly serious. "She told me she was planning to cut your head off in your sleep tonight. I told her I'd help her hide your body."

Ghorg snorted, "Are you telling a joke? You laugh and tell jokes?"

"Peace does weird things to people."

"Does this mean-?"

"Leave us!" Cold Hammer snapped abruptly and Ghorg ducked and ran to his dire wolf without looking back and Erinne snorted with amusement.

"That wasn't nice."

"It's who I am. You already know that. You're just the only one not scared of me. Strangely, you're also the one I want to murder most of the time because you won't back down and it infuriates me."

"Be honest, if I was as scared of you as everyone else, would you have fallen in love with me?"

He chuckled again, his eyes glowing, "I've never been an ideal mate. Orc women fear me like anyone else, I'm not agreeable,"

"Stubborn as hell,"

"Yes..." he feigned annoyance, "You and Lohke are the only ones that have earned my truest respect, but Lohke is not my type."

"I hope not or you both have a lot of explaining to do, particularly you. If you and Lohke are secret lovers tell me now."

"Excuse me?" She whipped her head around and saw Lohke approaching, probably to ask what was taking so long. Cold Hammer choked as he started laughing so hard that he doubled over and grabbed at his sore shoulder. His booming guffaw was infectious and she started giggling, covering her mouth while Lohke looked on through narrowed eyes looking less than amused. "I am sure I don't see anything funny here. Would one of you care to explain to me why you think Cold Hammer and I are secret lovers?"

Cold Hammer snickering beside her made her laugh all the harder until she finally calmed long enough to say, "No, I wouldn't care to elaborate," then she laughed so hard tears flooded her face.

Lohke waited a moment longer, shaking his head, and then said, "We're ready to leave, whenever you two think you can gather yourselves long enough to mount up." He walked away without another word but she still swore she saw a smirk, if not a confused one, as she continued cackling with Cold Hammer.