His Lie in April - 四月の彼の嘘 (Shigatsu no Kare no Uso) (COMPLETE)

A Pianist's Motivation/Working His Way Back

It was now a Saturday. The day had finally come where Kousei would get to try on his new, prosthetic left foot. The day began in a metal hydrotherapy whirlpool for Kousei. He started to become introspective about himself again, but his primary male nurse was there for him. Kousei wanted to share his feelings about his life.... so far, and what he wanted to do in the future. By now, the after-effects of his accident had been lessened, as the migraines he had were coming in somewhat less frequently than before. However, they still came in on occasion.

"You know, ultimately..... my goal in life is to become the best pianist in the world. My motivation is to try and make the best music as well, and make it sound right. I don't tell many people that, really, I don't want to jinx that; I'm somewhat superstitious about things. At the same time.... I'm such an utter perfectionist. My mother.... She made me want to take up the piano. And when your mother just becomes all rough on you, she puts these emotional shackles on you, and your playing just becomes almost like, monotonous, mechanical, automatic, even. My mind tends to be on autopilot when I play piano....  but, yet, somehow I feel even that with what I was born to do that... I can't escape my mother's influence. She made me who I am now. And then one day, this blond girl comes into my life.... She's unlike me, style wise. Hers sounds like she's engaging in a free-for-all fight. It's quite captivating. But, at that.... I think she may be making a difference in my life. I think I've developed a fondness for her. At the same time, though, I don't know what to say, but I have no idea how I tell how I have feelings for her. I don't want to let my other friends down.... I've known them for so long now, and to let then down would also be letting myself down."

The male nurse asked him, "So your motivation is to be one of the best pianists, if not musicians, out there? You certainly sound like you've gone through quite a bit of hell." Kousei nodded. "Yes..... but even though I lost my foot, and even though my mother's gone, it's time to free myself from my shackles. I may be a perfectionist, but I can't beat myself up for that anymore."

Just then, Kousei's phone came on. The nurse picked it up, saying "It's for you, Kousei. I think it's your friend." Sure enough, it was showing that he had a picture message from Kaori. "Hmm.... Wonder what Kaori has to show me?" To Kousei's amazement, it was Kaori, taking a picture with her phone, in a mirror, looking all happy wearing the Saskatchewan Roughrider team jersey. Also enclosed, a message saying Hey, Kousei! Check it out! My Canadian uncle Seiya got me the Roughriders team jersey! Oh, happy day! Kousei cracked a smile, and replied with You know, you look great in that jersey. Green is definitely your color! Kaori then replied back with Thank you so much, Kousei. Go Riders! :)

It was now noontime, and it was time for Kousei to try on his new, prosthetic left foot. Kousei was now wearing that charcoal gray tank top with black biker shorts. The attending rehab specialist said to Kousei "What we have here, Mr. Arima, is one of our most top-of-the-line prosthetic feet out there. It's made of a space age material, and is used by many Paralympic athletes around the world. We'd like you try it out." 

Kousei then said "Whoa.... it's that good? To be used by Paralympic athletes? I, or at least you guys, must have picked the right foot for myself here!" The specialist then attached the foot to the stump where his left foot formerly was. He got to work, walking slowly. "I think you might be slow at first, Kousei, but you'll catch on." At first, he tried to keep his balance. It seemed like with every step he took with his new prosthetic foot, he almost had no balance, and he felt like the Kousei of old. 

Kousei was undeterred by all this, however. He wanted to make clear that this was not the Kousei of old that was known as the Human Metronome. He would not give up; he remained determined in his mission to change himself. I am a new person..... this accident has changed me, and I want it for to be for the better. I'm a new Kousei, and I mustn't lose sight of all this!

But, as the minutes went by, it almost felt like he was walking like the accident had never occurred. Even though it had been almost a week since the accident, he was starting to feel confident about getting back on his feet. 

Kousei couldn't have felt more better about himself, as he finally became fully acclimated with his new prosthetic foot. He smiled beamingly. "Wow.... At first, I felt a bit clumsy without my left foot. But man..... this new one..... it's almost like I'm walking on air. I do feel great.." The specialist smiled back at him. "Good to hear, Kousei. By the way, the doctors tell you you'll be released tomorrow. How are you feeling?" "Better than I was five days ago.... The migraines have become less frequent.... Even though they still pop up. Everything is slowly coming back in to focus for me." He spent the rest of the training to walk again with his new prosthetic foot. For him, things went as good as they could get, even though he got off to a slow start with it.

Kousei then got back to the hospital bed, in what would be his last day in there, feeling optimistic and hopeful, once again. Indeed, his friends, especially Kaori, were making a real difference in his life.... and he wouldn't have wanted it any other way.