one day the shy kid just happens to run into someone he hadn't been wanting to see.
- their are a lot of triggers, so i'll leave trigger warnings at the beginning of chapters.
- bad description but the story is kinda okay, i promise.
-there is age r...
**::** soooo i put out two chapters last week or the week before i don't remember so i hope that will compensate for no chapter this week. i just have been feeling really overwhelmed recently and on top of that i have been working my ass off trying to get better grades and i actually thought i was doing good but then i got my grades and apparently i was failing geography and English. honestly i was expecting to do bad in geography but English has always been my strong suit so i was a huge kick in the gut to do so incredibly bad. i had like a million panic attacks over it and really beat myself up over it because like the one thing that i was ever good at and i still managed to destroy that. like i didn't know it was possible for me to be this big of a fuck up but here we are. i didn't relapse so i'm kinda proud of that.
i just really hate myself right now, like i have been doing bad in school for a while now but my parents don't know the extent of my anxiety and they don't know anything about my depression or self-harm so i like can't explain to them why i was doing so badly. i just was actually hoping that someone could be proud of me for once but i let myself get my hopes up and was disappointed when i failed (which isn't surprising)
my parents are so upset with me in general as a person that they don't even yell about my grades or anything anymore, which is good for my anxiety but just kinda makes me hate everything even more. also when i'm like having a panic attack i kinda like down talk myself about how much i suck and when i'm trying to make myself feel even worse about myself (idk why i do that, i just do) i always call myself Kyndal (my girl name). i just hate life right now and so i might miss a couple of weeks because my mental health isn't doing good and like grades aren't the only thing messing with me right now they're just one of the more recent ones and i'm sorry i didn't like update or anything.
- Adrian **::**
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