5. Walk Me Home

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Lunch eventually ended, Fandy left with an hour to kill before his next class, and Zach already skipping.

"You sure you don't want to go to class?" Fandy asked, getting major anxiety from even thinking about skipping class. "It's worth it to try."

"Nah." Zach smiled wisely, looking up at the cloudy sky. "I like being with you more."

This made Fandy smile. Zach looked over, seeing that sheepish grin, and licked his lips. He really liked Fandy, and would do anything to make their date last as long as possible.

Suddenly, Fandy spoke up. "Why do you like me so much?"

They were walking back to the university, side by side, but Fandy was trying his hardest not to touch Zach. His hands were deep in his pockets and he was trying to stay at least a foot away from him.

After the hand kiss, Fandy began to panic. He could already feel his heart falling, getting closer to liking Zach more than he was willing to. He wouldn't let Zach in any further, wouldn't let him ruin his chances of becoming an actor. Fandy was determined, unwilling to let anyone come between him and his dream. There was no way he would.

"Why I like you?" Zach asked, in a mocking tone like he was making fun of Fandy. "There's too many reasons for me to say right now."

"That just means you don't like me that much." Fandy grumbled, stuffing his hands further into his pockets.

"Not true at all." Zach said. Fandy was annoyed at how well he was handling the situation. "I think you're really nice. And really funny. Not to mention how handsome I find you." Zach bumped him with his arm, making Fandy blush. "I have my reasons, but I don't want to expose them all here. Maybe some place more... private."

Fandy looked up just in time to see Zach wink.

This boy must have been sent by a rival student out to kill him, there was no way anyone would actually be this flirtatious towards Fandy.

Fandy was arguing with his dreams inside right now. One side of him said, no, don't let him in, he'll only cause you trouble. The other persisted. You clearly like Zach, and he likes you. Give it a chance, he's not trying to cause you stress.

Fandy stopped on the street, making Zach stop beside him. "When can I see you again?" He asked, eyes trailing Zach's face.

"Anytime you want." He smiled.

"How's Wednesday?" Fandy suggested, making Zach smile immediately. Wednesday was a night his roommate had practice, so he would have the dorm to himself.

"Wednesday's perfect." Zach confirmed, and they continued walking. "Do you want to come to my dorm? We can watch a movie on my laptop."

Fandy was again faced with a inner battle against his brain's two forces. One said, dorm room? He must think you're stupid. The other said, you need to let down your barrier and trust that Zach won't hurt you.

Fandy bit his lip. "Sure." Then he turned to smile at Zach. "I have a nine am morning class that day so it'll work out."

"Awesome." Zach nodded, then glanced over that him. "You know, you really shouldn't keep your hands in fists like that. It makes them unbelievably sweaty."

"What do you suggest?" Fandy replied.

"Let me hold your hand, I'll show you how to relax it." He slid his hand down Fandy's forearm, then intertwined their fingers, making Fandy let out a small gasp. "There you go. They'll be better now."

That. That was smooth.

•••

"And he just-?"

"Took my hand!"

"Just in the-?"

"In the middle of the sidewalk!"

"Fandyyyyyyyy...." Nick said, giving his friend the eye. "You go boy. Get it."

"Nick." Fandy shook his head. "Don't make it anything it isn't."

"Anything it isn't?" Nick pretended to look offended. "Fandy, you held hands with him. I'm not sure how to make it look like something it isn't."

Fandy groaned, throwing his head back against the couch. "I'm having a crisis because of this." He slouched over, burying his face in his hands. It felt safer there.

Nick laughed at him for a long time. When he was done, he walked over to Fandy's couch, patting him on the back. "Look, Fandy, you can't conceal yourself forever."

"I know."

"You can't hide from everyone all the time."

"I know."

"I know your afraid of getting serious with someone out of fear that your career will be jeopardized, but you need to trust someone." Fandy rolled his head around in his palms, feeling overheated. "Fandy, if you won't trust anyone else, trust Zach."

"I can't." As these two words escaped, Fandy felt hot tears running down his cheeks, cooling the skin, but making him feel weak, making him feel vulnerable. "You know that I can't because of what happened."

Nick nodded, patting his back again and again. He remembered the first time Fandy told him about high school. Fandy had been popular at one point, with lots of friends (mostly girls) by his side at all times. That was, until another female student started multiple rumours about him that made his friends around him leave, one by one, until he was a loner.

The rumours had started by someone Fandy was previously very close to. She was the only person he was willing to open up to, and additionally, the first person he had a crush on.

They had a falling out around the beginning of twelfth grade, in which Fandy was upset for weeks. He was comforted by his friends, but not for long, as they left when the rumours began to come out.

Fandy was more than relived to move to Taipei after that, glad he wasn't going to see any of his previous friends faces anymore. The incident had made it impossible for him to get close to anyone but Nick ever since.

Now, Zach was like a new army trying to break down the walls Fandy had put up to protect himself.

How far was Fandy willing to go to keep from getting hurt again?

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