For the Love of Chaos

A lie

Stiles sensed Erica was going to push the issue, so he stood. "I should go, I'm feeling better."

Isaac snorted in response, "That was a lie."

"I'll drive you," Derek huffed before grabbing his keys off a nearby table, shooting a look at Isaac.

"It's fine, I can walk," Stiles insisted with a shake of his head. The last thing he wanted was to be alone with Derek in a car.

"There is an alpha pack out there, you shouldn't be alone," Derek growled. He didn't have the patience for this right now.

"I'm not a werewolf, I'm no threat," Stiles reached for the door.

"You're an emissary," Derek snapped.

Stiles whirled around; his tone sharp. "No, I'm not."

Derek's jaw clenched. He forgot how stubborn Stiles could be.

"I may have a spark or what the hell ever, but I'm not an emissary. I don't even know what abilities I have," Stiles gestured to himself dramatically.

"Then how did you know you were a spark?" Erica tilted her head in question.

Stiles swallowed, "Like I said, Deaton." It wasn't technically a lie.

"Stiles, you spend every day with werewolves; you smell like us. It's suicide to go out there alone."

The human ran a hand through his hair. He did not want to do this. He thought he would muster the guts to tell Derek but now he knew he didn't have it in him, and he just wanted to go home.

"Fine."

"Bye, Stiles," Erica purred with a small wave.

Stiles gave a curt nod, pressing his lip together before following Derek out. His feet felt like lead as he made his way down the stairs and to Derek's car.

Once the two were inside the Camaro and Derek had started it, he turned to look at Stiles, "You're obviously more uncomfortable now than you were inside. You stopped being uncomfortable around me weeks ago, what's changed?"

Stiles knew Derek could hear the way his heartrate picked up at the question by how his eyes dropped to Stiles' chest briefly.

"Nothings changed." A lie.

"You're nervous around me now."

"No, I'm not." Another lie.

"Are you afraid of me?" Derek asked the question almost like he didn't want to know the answer.

"No, not as much as I should be," Stiles shook his head.

"Good," Derek turned back to the steering wheel. That answer hadn't been a lie, thankfully. "I would never hurt you."

Stiles hummed in uncertainty, "I wouldn't say never."

Derek frowned.

"Come on, I only have immunity because I'm friends with Scott. Something happens to him..." Stiles trailed off.

"That's not true," Derek's tone was low as he spoke, and he didn't look away from the road. "You're part of this world now, if something ever happened to Scott, there is always a place for you in my pack."

Stiles mouth fell open slightly. "I don't understand. What happened to not wanting an emissary?"

"I don't, but you've been there for me several times, so I'm inclined to trust you." There was a pause. "Also, I know what it's like to be alone in this. I wouldn't wish it on anyone."

Stiles nodded but didn't respond. That was why Derek had helped Scott after he was bit.

"Are you going to tell me what you're hiding?" Derek asked after a few minutes.

"W-what?" Stiles snapped his heads towards Derek.

"You've been lying all night. I'm guessing there's something about this spark of yours that you're not talking about."

Stiles swallowed the lump forming in his throat. The mark under his shirt itched liked it wanted to be revealed. He could tell Derek. They were alone. He reached for his shirt but paused. He recalled what Derek had said about not wanting an emissary. His fingers rubbed the mark through the thin fabric. He couldn't do it. His hand dropped back to his lap.

"It's not my business. But I'm going to assume you're keeping it from Scott as well since you sent him off earlier while you stayed behind. Might I suggest you not keep whatever it is to yourself long. Secrets can get people hurt." The last sentence was said with such an animosity Stiles was sure it wasn't meant for him.

"I will, I just need time," Stiles answered quietly; his eyes never leaving his lap. He felt like a scolded child. He wondered how Derek knew he was keeping something. It didn't seem like he knew what, but he hoped that was truly the case.

Much to Stiles relief, Derek pulled into his driveway.

"Thanks for the ride," Stiles gave Derek an unsure smile.

"Thanks for your help earlier," Derek nodded in return.

"Sure, anytime you need me to do some research or look someone up, let me know," Stiles frowned slightly as the words fell from his mouth. Why did he just offer that like he and Derek were friends?

"Yeah, I will," Derek had a slight frown of his own.

Stiles hurriedly closed the door to the Camaro and made his way inside. Much to his relief his dad wasn't home, so he had some time to process everything that had happened that day.

He climbed the stairs and threw himself down on his bed with a groan. Why was his life always so chaotic?

Derek sat unmoving from Stiles' driveway for a moment. He and Stiles had always had an odd relationship but today had been different. Derek had been concerned for him in a way he hadn't in the past. Sure, he was always more concerned for Stiles than he'd admit to, but today it was more. Like he was part of Derek's pack. And the way Stiles had stayed behind and had worked to help him look up the remaining members. It felt...natural. He wanted to chalk it up to Stiles being a spark now and he an alpha but how could he know for sure?

He checked the clock. Seven p.m, Deaton would still be in his office. Maybe he would have answers. 

*AN*
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