Awsten left Ottos house feeling relieved yet stressed. He really just hooked up with some random dude he met hours before. Who was he?
Awsten sat in silence while he drove home.
Once he got home he couldn't do anything. He felt terrible. He tried to go to sleep but instead he ended up staring at the ceiling thinking about what he just did.
A sudden urge washed over the boy, his mouth started salivating and he knew what was about to happen.
Awsten rushed to the bathroom doubling over the toilet throwing up his meal into the toilet. This happened from time to time when he got real anxious.
Trowing up took all the small boys energy so he went and took off his jeans and tank top off and threw on a sweater.
Awsten fell back onto his bed, drowning in self hatred and fell asleep.
//TRIGGER WARNING SELF HARM//
Awsten woke up in a cold sweat. He had nightmares often but this one was really bad.
The shaking boy walked to the bathroom and splashed some water on his face, the razor blade caught his eye and he bit his lip, could he do this? Should he?
His mom would be so disappointed if she knew
He gulped as he thought about what he was about to do and picked up the razor
---
Awsten sat down on the bathroom floor pulling down his sweater sleeves and crying into them, he was doing so well and he threw it all away.
He told himself he would never do it again and here he was, with fresh blood and tears.
Awsten picked up his phone, ringing the only person he knew who could help.
Geoff.
YOU ARE READING
Helpless // Gawsten
FanfictionMaybe it wasn't too bad being someones second Maybe it was better than being nothing at all
