A/N: lol can you tell I gave up on Roman numerals? oops
** trigger warning**
Alex's POV:
I woke up in a daze, when did I fall asleep? what time is it?
what day is it?
I looked at my phone and saw multiple texts asking if I was okay and how sorry people were. i looked up at the ceiling. white. blank. boring.
I was confused but then it all came back.
I went into panic remembering what had happened.
the vivid memories came back of Gabe on top of me yelling at me, holding me down. he told me how worthless I am, which now I understand very well. and then Oliver coming in and hitting him, how angry he was. the rage in his eyes. where was he? I got up looking around "Oli?" I called out.
no reply.
I decided to take a shower, maybe that could calm me down. as I stripped I stepped into the steaming water and watched as my red hair dye faded into a pink colour and leak down the drain. I started to cry once again I couldn't handle it.
it got worse and worse as I started to weep and sob, trying to catch my breath I gasped for air louder and louder.
**trigger warning**
I let out a loud sob and looked to my razor. I took it in my hands and looked down at my thighs then I looked up at the ceiling. "your more than this" I looked down fighting the thoughts but it was so hard. too hard. I moved the razor down closer to my thigh, "take a look inside cherish your life and live before you loose it." I whispered dropping the razor. it's a stupid thing I do to remind myself I don't need to do it, that I have more to do before I can fully go.
**trigger warning over**
I sobbed once again not holding it in this time. I rinsed off my body and shut off the shower I leaned against the wall still crying.
I tried to breathe, inhale. exhale. inhale ex-
"Alex you okay?" I heard oli's voice
"oli- oliver? OLI. OLI IM NAKED" I screamed seeing his shadow through the shower curtains
"c'mon out I have you're towel, I know you're not okay" he pleaded.
"naked Oliver. n-a-k-e-d. no clothes, everything exposed" I lowered my voice covering my body even though all he could see was most likely a shadow or nothing at all.
"I'll close my eyes just come out" he laughed
"promise?"
"I promise" he reassured me
"okay close them now"
I quickly grabbed the towel and wrapped it around my body. I looked at myself in the mirror and sighed at my puffy eyes and makeup free face. I winced at the sight of bruises and love bites that Gabe had left on my arms collar bones and shoulders.
"you covered?" he asked peeking at me
"I look like a fucking egg" I said turning around shielding his eyes from the horrid sight
"cute egg" he mumbled
I turned around and looked at him surprised. "I have to get dressed" I giggled he walked out of the bathroom and I slipped into my black "mosh" short shorts from warped tour and Oliver's big t-shirt. I towel dried my hair and applied a little bit of makeup to hide the ugly that covered my natural face. I tried to make it look natural just cover up and powder. not like I was trying hard to look good or impress Oliver. well maybe I was.
I took one last look in the mirror. I thought back on the last few weeks.
everything was good until last night. everything was fine but that one thing is fucking it all up. I was thought to be normal, I had friends, I was normal, I wasn't the girl who drank with some random guy and almost got raped by him. but now, now I'm am that girl.
to most people a "terrible day" is traffic, being late to school or work, getting in trouble with your parents or boss. but those aren't the "terrible days" those are the easy days. you don't know a terrible day until you've been in the worst position possible, until you have felt so bad that even though whatever happened wasn't your fault you can't look in the mirror the same way.
when I walked into my room Oliver stood up from sitting on my bed holding out his arms. tears welled up in my eyes, I went over to him as he wrapped his big arms around me. he smelled amazing, i felt so comfortable "I'm an emotional mess" I chuckled a little
"it's okay everyone is, at least just a little bit" he sat down on my bed and signaled for me to sit with him. we put on the television as I soon started to dose off and slowly fall into Oliver's lap.
"Alex uh, could we talk" Oliver whispered playing with my hair
I sat up crossing my legs and looking up at him "yeah of course"
"so I know we're in our final year and all but because it's the final year everyone's going to homecoming and prom instead of skipping homecoming would you want to maybe go with me?" he said nervously
I simply smiled at him "yes"
he leaned in close to me and stopped about a inch away from my lips leaning his forehead against mine
"and maybe we could go out to lunch again tomorrow? like as in a date" he smiled back at me.
"gladly" I replied as he pulled me in crashing his lips against mine. he started to beg for entrance to my mouth as our tongues entertained. we pulled away he looked into my eyes "I really am starting to like you kid" he laughed
"wow you have emotions?" I chuckled
"shut up cuddle and watch the movie" he kissed my forehead and I soon fell asleep in his arms.
