Feed the Muse: Inner Monologues (Vol. I) [√]

[ i think loving you is a disease ]

This boy that I love is my own personal wildfire. He is consuming me with his flames of passion and deceit all rolled into one perfect combination of a man. He is spreading like poison, toxic yet slightly addicting, a mixture of both good and bad. He cannot be contained, and like a wildfire, he will burn you down with the inferno behind his hazel eyes; my favorite cup of coffee in this lifetime.

This boy that I love is my own personal tidal wave. He is drowning me with his waves of reluctance and hesitation, breaking my heart as it crashes into the shores of desperation. I am treading in dangerous waters whenever I am with him; choosing between getting pulled in by his warmth or sink to the bottom of his tragic underwater chasm. He is cold yet the feel of him makes me very much alive.

This boy that I love is my own personal Monday morning. With the sheets tangled in my legs and my bed a cozy heaven of peace, I am one with him. The seductive trance-like situation keeps me from getting ready to face the day ahead, a continuous slow torture of staying or leaving. The rays of the sun seep through the drapes on my curtains, reminding me of the beauty of the outdoors, but he drags me back down to him, whispering "just five more minutes" in a sleeping voice that speaks of so many heartbreaks.

This boy that I love is my own personal thunderstorm. The sky crackles with the energy he brings, falling down into the earth in a wet splatter of art and rain. His laugh, an echo in the vast dark clouds, covering the stars with a blank sheet of lightning; scary and frightening yet I choose to welcome him with an open heart, waiting for the strike to split me and my secrets open.

He is a walking myriad of contradictions; my own personal ironies on a rainy weather; my favorite kind of day.