Who doesn't like a laugh?

Chapter 6- Insults

411

You're so stupid that you had to call 411 to get the number for 911.

Bald Bubble

Are you really that bald, or is your neck just blowing a bubble?

Definition of Diplomacy

Q: What is the definition of diplomacy?

A: The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

20 Disses

Words can't describe your outfit, so I'll just throw up

They can't measure your intelligence. The scale won't go that low.

Appearances can be deceiving. Or in your case, disgusting.

I promise not to make fun of your height. I would never stoop that low

I'm glad you're tall. It gives me more of you to dislike.

I think you stepped on something smelly. Like your feet!

I've seen tables with nicer looking legs than yours.

Are you going to eat that apple, or gum it to death?

Your mouth's the perfect size... for your foot.

I've seen a nose like yours before, but it looked better on the baboon.

Know what I like about your face? Me neither.

Know what goes best with a face like yours? A paper bag.

Why don't you do something different with your hair? Like, wash it.

You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.

You'll never use your mind. You can't lose what you never had.

You've made this date I won't forget... no matter how hard I try.

I know why they call this a "blind date." Because now that I've seen you, I wish I were blind.

You're like disposable diapers...always getting dumped.

''What are you doing Friday night?'' ''Trying to forget you just asked me that.''

"What's he got that I haven't?" "You want it alphabetically?"

Dumb Brunettes

Q: Why are there no dumb brunettes?

A: Peroxide.

Californians & Granola Bars

Q: How is California like a granola bar?

A: They both contain nuts and flakes.

Farting Into the Great Beyond

Your fart was so loud that astronauts in space mistook it for a message from Houston!

Harvard Graduate

How do you get a Harvard graduate off your porch?