The Outlaw: Shattered Past Book Seven (Forsaken)

Chapter 12: The Dark Within Us

James sat down with Sidriks in a private chamber in the city of Cirtugan. James lay back on the chair as one of the handmaidens of the palace offered him a drink. James smiled up and took the glass as his Elik friend sat down across from him. The Exo gently put the glass up to his lips and letting a bit of the cool, bitter drink into his mouth, after swallowing it he set it down and looked across to Sidriks.

"You hardly ever request to see me alone James," Sidriks told him. "The first time was when you learned of Cameron's pregnancy...I'm assuming that this is under a similar circumstance."

"Similar in importance," He said with a sigh leaning forward and interlocking his fingers. "Sid...I...I don't know what to do about Aaron.."

Sidriks closed his eyes and nodded. "I understand why you came to me for this...you're trying to determine what to do, is that right?"

"The more Scorn that Aaron kills the closer he gets to Uldren...and I know that Mara would have Aaron killed if anything happened to her brother. I already failed him once...I can't face having him placed in the Loop, or worse." James said as Sidriks swirled a glass of white wine in his top right hand.

"Let me ask you this James: are you doing this for him? Or are you doing this for yourself?"

"What?" James chuckled. "No, this is about the stability of the Confederation, if we don't properly deal with this then-"

"Jameson," Sidriks said interrupting him. . "I asked if you were doing this for yourself." He said looking at James with his eyes squinted. James leaned back in his chair again as the lights from the city peered in through the windows. In the quiet, it was just the two of them there. One leader to another. Sidriks sighed. "When you sacrificed yourself fourteen years ago, you saw something. A future that you had inadvertently helped to create. A dark time that lead to the destruction of everything you knew...and as far as I know, it was the first time that you had felt guilt."

"What are you suggesting?"

"I'm implying that you want Aaron to return to you because you don't want to take responsibility for the death of your friend." He said. "You are afraid of that feeling..."

"I am afraid of nothing."

"You don't have to lie to me...I have lived thousands of years longer than you, I can tell when someone is afraid." Sidriks replied. "You are only a man James, you can't just avoid these feelings. They're inevitable. Jealousy, anger, greed, fear, lust, you have all of those. In spite of what you may be inclined to think, you are not infallible." Sidriks continued. James looked down at the floor and placed his hands on his head.

"I know..."

"James...I know what it's like to lose your friends...many of mine betrayed me." Sidriks said standing up and walking over to him and placing a hand on his shoulder. "Aaron doesn't want anything to do with any of us...and even if you could bring him in, he wouldn't rest until Uldren lay six feet under."

As Sidriks spoke to him, he could hear James softly sniffle. "I'm sorry...but I have no advice to give...if he does what we know he will do...then the Awoken will deal with him. But do not send anyone else...they will die." Sidriks said sitting down next to James and lay his top arm over his shoulder. James had been under a ton of stress as of late, and with nobody that he could really turn to except for Sidriks and his wife. "If you want to stay here for the night, you may stay in the guest room."

"No..no, I'll...I'll be alright..." James said sniffling and standing up. The Exo shook his head and rubbed off whatever tears he had shed. He put on his sweatshirt and started walking out of the palace. "Thank you for listening..."