A Vampire's Pride

Crushing On Evil

Viola's POV

                    I'm twitching uncomfortably as Varla positions me in the middle of a candle lit circle. She claims that 'Wiccan witches' often use elements to power their craft, and fire is one of hers. She told Claire to light up the candles and I got to witness first hand what it was like for her to burn. Sweat beads were still trailing down her forehead, panting in a corner as I whispered a breath of frosted air in her direction. Nobody noticed what I had done— nobody except for Kilian as always. He was watching me like a hawk, showing his distrust in Varla.

I just think that she's a harmless crabby old woman, not a serial killer and evil witch. Ha. I don't get why he's so overprotective when it comes to me. Maybe it's because I'm technically his for a year.

I scratch the back of my head in awkwardness as Varla chants to her 'spirits'. I watch as she dances around me barefoot, sandals thrown in the corner of her tent. I glance at the flames dancing around me as I suddenly feel the heat, nerves eating at me.

"Oh spirits young and old— show me the way. Show me into the channels of her mind." She chants, throwing petals of hibiscus and baby's breath around me.

"You didn't say you needed to enter mind." Kilian bites out— and that might be the second time I've ever seen him irritated. But this time, it's different. Last time was a test, this time, he was worried.
Varla shrugs him off as she continues her dance around me.

            "Show me— her doom." She barks— and that's the last thing I hear as I black out.

            I can feel her here, in the darkest parts of my mind.

        I feel everything and then nothing at all. I am one with ice and water, I feel myself sink deeper into the trenches of my mind. There, I see memories of me and my father, of my crushes young and old, and— Kilian is here too. A memory of him appearing my room that night, calling me sweetheart.

        I don't know what to think of it all, I don't know what she's looking for. It's like she's digging through a trunk of my memories, throwing all of unwanted information out, but Kilian— she pauses for a moment at Kilians memory. And then I feel burning shame as her voice echoes throughout my mind.

           "Oh you foolish child, demons don't love." She scolds me. "Whatever you feel or are starting to feel for that thing— you'd be better off signing up for a nunnery. Evil things they are— demons I mean. They can play with you, toy with your heart and mind until you're nothing but mush. Trust me, I know." I can feel the disapproving stare in my mind as she observes the lingering attraction that I feel for a demon that couldn't possibly feel the same.

            "Stupid, stupid girl." She chides at me as I feel despair, almost as if I was a five year old disappointing my first grade teacher again. I try to call out in my mind. 'What do you want? What are you looking for? Did you just come here to embarrass me?' I cry out into the memories she's continued to throw at me.

        The next memory is me tackling kilian and landing on him, his eyes wide with surprise and amusement. I can't keep up with the memories she's throwing at me.

           The next and last memory is of my father— he's talking about my ice being the ruining of me if I don't learn how to control it, to master it. I would be controlled by my ice.

         "There you are." She croaks out, and then I'm sucked back into reality.

I hear a popping noise in my ears as I regain consciousness to Kilian cradling me in his arms calling my name.

I flutter my eyes open and meet his glowing red ones, I can immediately see the relief pooling in his face as I take in a large gulp of air.

"Vi.." he whispers, almost as if he was scared. I blink, and then I blink again. There goes the burning shame reddening my cheeks again at what Varla had to see.
She looked through my most intimate memories and shamed me. She insulted my weak human feelings— and she was right.

I scramble away from Kilian, pushing myself out of his strong arms and onto the carpet. He gives me a confused look as he tries to stop me.

"Are you okay? She— she was in your head-" he says as hurriedly glance around the tent. I meet eyes with Varla as she gives me a knowing look that makes me feel even worse.

"I'm fine." I bite out, not breaking eye contact with Varla.

"What did you find?" Claire asks in interest as the old woman answers her.

"Nothing much, just some memories that didn't matter. And I found what's haunting her." She snaps her eyes up to Claire, breaking eye contact with me.

"Her ice powers are going to take her over if she's not careful. People can get hurt." She says tensely, as if she hadn't just scrambled my memories of Kilian and my wants from him. I can't even look at him without embarrassment clouding me.

He can't feel anything except for pleasure from tormenting innocents.

Claire gives me a baffled look as Atticus rubs her back. "I didn't know that you had ice powers." She says dumbfounded as I nod tersely.

"It wasn't public knowledge." I whisper, feeling a sudden sense of regret at the idea to even come here at all.
     I guess I hadn't even realized that I liked Kilian— maybe a sense of attraction but like? Letting him get under my skin, into the soft spots was the worst thing I could do. I could never trust a demon. This is a deal and that's all it ever will be. With those thoughts, I shake my head and clear my throat. I clasp my hands together and look up, eyeing Kilian underneath my eyelashes. He looks very pensive, as if trying to decipher why I was acting weird.

            I glance at Varla and smile bitterly.

          "So, are we going to find my father or what?" I say as Varla nods slowly.

              "For that— I'll need demon blood." She looks in Kilians direction, and I pale.

             I suddenly feel sick, and it isn't because I get queasy with blood.

"Great." I force out with a smile. "Just great."

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