Freedom Scouts School for Powered Individuals

A Night Under the Stars

I opened my eyes and saw once again Levi was sitting up at his desk. "Levi?" I mumbled as I sat up and rubbed at my eyes. No answer. I checked the time. 10:07pm. I made my way to my feet and let out a stretch. Sure enough, he was sleeping at his desk again.

He was sitting straight up with crossed and one leg crossed over the other. I was wondering if he was really sleeping or not at first. I walked up next to him and his eyes were closed his arms crossed over his chest.

"Levi?" I said again hoping to wake him up and at least get him into his own bed. He looked like he really needed the sleep. I wonder if he ever falls asleep in his actual bed or he just sleeps at his desk for a few hours and calls it a night. I've never seen him do anything but sit on his bed, hell I've never even seen him change into close to go to sleep in. Now that I think about it I've never seen him in anything but jeans. 

Despite sleeping in such a weird position his head remained straight up not hunched over to one side or the other. 

I watched a wince appear on his face and his eyes and jaw clenched. "No." he mumbled and I felt a wave of pure sadness hit me so hard tears stung my eyes. His hands squeezed his arms and all his muscles seemed to tense up.

"Levi," I said again placing my hand on his shoulder and shaking it very lightly. He must be having a nightmare.

His eyes shot open and he shot straight up to his feet. He was standing on his feet before ever being truly awake "Stop!" He yelled before looking around and locking eyes with me. 

"Sorry I-I just-," I stammered for a second.

He let his muscles relax a little and he shifted his weight one leg more than the other as his leg slid closer to him out of a fighting stance. "No I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell it was just a bad dream and I wasn't fully awake yet I guess," he said taking a deep breath and looking back at me. "You're crying?" He took a step closer before stopping in his tracks.

"Huh, oh they aren't my tears," I mumbled quietly. He wasn't crying, but it was his emotions that caused them. I guess I'm just more of a wuss than he is.

"Oh. Sorry," he said quietly. "Really bad dream." he cleared his throat before grabbing his shoes. "Are you ready to head out?" He asked quickly changing the subject off of the current topic.

"No," I'm not even dressed I'm still in pajamas. I thought looking down at myself.

"Oh, sorry, I'll wait for you to get ready," he said taking a seat on his bed. He still seemed a little tense. His eyes wouldn't leave the ground and his hands were still balled into fists.

I grabbed my clothes and headed into the bathroom closing the door behind me. Somethings up tonight. He seems really shaken up and just jumpy in general. Maybe he dreamt of his power trigger, I mean it's not uncommon. Armin, Mikasa and I have all done it. I guess it's just the reoccurring nightmares you can't ever get rid of.

I remember countless times waking up to screaming whether it be my own, Armin's or Mikasa's back when I was living with them. I never really thought much about it, but I guess it seems everyone here must have similar experiences. I mean hell, those were the worst times in our lives some of us remember them forever as vividly as if they were happening in front of our faces. Others are lucky and their minds block it out for them. 

These nightmares are just a fact of life. I heard some people have them every night, others are less frequent, but I can imagine all of them are just as horrifying. I sometimes dream about my mom's death. Despite not being there I still see the scene as vividly as if I was there. That's the dream I dread having. Every night I fear that will be in my dreams, and so far I've been lucky. I haven't dreamt it in over a month now, and I hope to keep it that way. I took a breath and cleared my mind. I got way off subject, and not in the good way.