The Aftermath

Sam and Fury

The last time Sam saw Natasha, she was running towards Thanos with a pair of tasers. Freaking tasers against a giant purple alien ape with magic stones. Then in a blink of an eye she was gone, or rather, he was gone. And then Sam remembered coming back, appearing exactly where he remembered disintegrating, only, it wasn't the exact when. Thank god, Strange appeared almost instantly too, through a portal, and started briefing everyone of what was happening.

"What's happening right now is," Strange said, "in about fifteen minutes, Captain Rogers will stand face to face with the largest army the galaxy has ever seen, with no army and a broken shield."

The idea of Steve standing against an enemy no matter how pained and bruised he is, was not news to Sam. But what bothered Sam was Steve doing it alone. Because for as long as he had known Steve, Natasha was always by Steve's side. Sure, Natasha didn't join them those months of searching for Bucky and she was on the other side during the whole Accords debacle, but she was always there when Steve needed her the most. He didn't have time to think about it too much as T'Challa and Okoye started rounding up the Wakandan army and Strange drawing out these magic portals out of thin air.

The whole battle was a blur to Sam. He remembered a few details as he did his bit while hovering over the massive chaos. He remembered seeing Clint running with a golden thing in his arms, white horses with wings flying around him, and most especially, Steve summoning Mjolnir. Even now, he couldn't shake off the chills when he heard his captain commanded everyone to assemble, but, he also remembered feeling a weird knot in his stomach when he didn't see her familiar figure, who he thought had always looked perfect, at home, right by Steve's side.

When victory was theirs and Steve was giving him and Bucky a welcome back hug, Sam wanted to ask where she was. But for some reason he couldn't bring himself to spit the words out of his mouth, maybe because a part of him already knew the answer, and it was one he didn't particularly like. He thought maybe not knowing was probably better than denying the truth. But it was Natasha, not some stranger you'd see regularly in the same cafe because you both liked the croissants there.

"Where's Nat?" Wanda asked as her feet touched ground and the red glows disappeared from her hands.

Sam turned to Steve and one look at him confirmed the worst. Steve was already crying because of Tony, but Wanda's question triggered a far greater pain buried inside him and he couldn't do anything else but cry even more. None of them spoke for a while after that. Bucky simply walked over to his best friend and hugged him. Wanda fell on her knees and buried her face in her palms.

Natasha was one, if not the fiercest woman he has ever known. He didn't know that much about her past, except for the information she dumped in the internet and a few vague stories she was kind enough to share. He found her scary, yes, but even he wouldn't deny that it made her appeal all the more palpable, irresistible even.

He witnessed first hand Natasha's fierceness, in battle and in the relationships she had. She didn't have a lot of functioning relationships and so she protected those she cared about with utmost loyalty and trust, the two ways she knew best how to express love. Steve was lucky, he was a direct beneficiary of that.

So now, Sam couldn't help but feel a bit jealous of Steve. Continuing Captain America's legacy wouldn't be easy for him. Not only because he did not have superhuman powers, a small band of soldiers to command, but he also did not have a Natasha Romanoff by his side.

"You have to admit, half of the reason you, me, and Wanda survived all those years of running and hiding was Natasha. Your 'How to be a Fugitive' manual was underwhelming," Sam said with a chuckle.