Poem #217

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"I don't mean to sound dramatic
but lately I've been going to bed around 8 o'clock because staying awake for any longer is just too painful
my bones ache with sadness
and although I eat, my stomach still feels empty
like It's a black hole of plain misery
my heart is heavy and grey
that's the only way to keep it from breaking each day
the marks on my skin are beginning to bleed when I cry at night because the scars aren't closed shut enough to keep my emotion in
the air against my chapped lips hurts because I pick at the skin and let it sting
it's the only way I can keep myself from screaming when I see him in the hallways
wait I'm sorry
don't grab me please
i didn't mean to drop the coffee cup mom don't yell
my days have become long and weary
i can't drag myself around anymore
it's not my fault
"it's the drugs their giving her"
I hear my family whisper as I drift off on the couch
"all she does is pop pills, she can't even really help herself"
the demons trace my face
and my hips
and yank on my air as they yell in my ears
im sorry dad I didn't mean to ignore you
yes I'm listening I promise
no don't leave , come back
I'm sorry I'm not the daughter you always wanted
I'm trying my best
so when I go to bed at 8 o'clock
because I say it's too painful to be awake anymore , I didn't spill my secrets for nothing
the words leaking from lips are true
my mind is slipping ,
and there's nothing anyone can do about it
please let me preserve my sanity while I can
you won't have to deal with me soon
so just let me sleep."
-r.b
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This is kinda messy idk where it came from but it's a raw poem so yea
-your very own broken girl ❤️

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