Year 10; Day 3661
They were letting me out of the hospital today and I couldn't be more grateful. To spend my last weeks in the hospital is the worst way to go in my mind. As someone who's been in the hospital probably over a thousand times, I rather be at home any day. To feel the sunshine on my pale and dying body felt great. My legs are getting weaker and weaker as the days go, something I knew would happen. I leaned on my mum for support as we walked to the car.
Tony sat on one side of me and Luke on the other. My little brother has been very quiet these past few days. Was it because I was actually dying and he didn't know what to say or was it just plain weird for him? He was always a nerd in the aspects of gaming and school. He just loved to learn about everything and then come home to game. I'm scared that when I die, that'll all go to waste. I'm scared his grades will go down the drain and he'll stop trying.
"Hey," I said, leaning over to him. He looked up at me, raising an eyebrow. "You okay?"
He nodded. "Yeah I'm okay. It's me who should be asking that."
"Well you know perfectly well how I'm doing. I'm being serious Tony, are you okay?"
He glanced out the window for a moment before answering me. "For now I guess. Can we just talk about this later?"
"Sure, when you're ready."
The rest of the drive was silent. My parents had a small conversation as we drove down the highway. Taking in my surrounding, I sighed. Soon it would be the three of them; my family. Then there was Luke added to this, alone in his feelings. The love of his life was dying and there was nothing he could do. How frustrated he must feel, how angry.
How was he going to cope when I'm gone? Write songs? Cry out in anger? Not talk to anyone for days? These are all things he's going to do. I know him well enough to know it those things and more. Once we were home, Luke helped me to my room. We sat on my bed, Luke playing with the hem of his shirt.
"Do you need anything?" He asked me, glancing over.
I didn't meet his glaze but just shook my head in response. The thoughts in my mind were helping. I was leaving everyone.
"What's wrong?"
Lie. My brain told me. You have to lie for him.
"I- Er... I'm just tired I guess," I said slowly and lied back on my bed. The blanket was comfy, way comfier than the hospital beds.
He stares at me. "You're lying Alex."
"Maybe I don't want to talk about it!" I snapped and immediately felt bad but didn't say anything. I just rolled over so I was facing away.
"Okay okay. I'm going to have shower," He said, leaning over to kiss my forehead before heading out of the room. When he disappeared and I could hear the showering running, I hugged myself and rolled into a ball. I turned on Netflix and began to watch How I Met Your Mother when Luke came in a 20 minutes later not wearing a shirt. The view wasn't bad at all but it didn't take me out of this funk I was in.
"What're you watching?" He asked absentmindedly while pulling a shirt. It was a bright blue one, unusual from he regular dark clothes.
I ignored him and laughed at the colour. "What is with the shirt?"
Luke wasn't facing me and he bent down to get something. What ever he's doing, the show is moreinteresting at the moment.
"Can you meet me downstairs in 15 minutes? Also can you wear this?" Luke wondered once he pulled on a hoodie and faced me as he held a bright blue dress in his hands. It was a maxi dress with white flower on it and it was really nice. I raised my eyebrows but nodded.
