L A T C H E D (NGS #4 Ineryss' Version)

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I had left with no choice but to go with the flow. Para kaming nasa isang bangka na hindi na kayang dalhin ang bigat at mas napili ni Mommy na ako ang itulak para mapigilan ang paglubog nito.

I know how to swim, but I'm not sure how long I can last or if I'm going to drown. Who's going to save me? Or I'll die believing someone's going to save me, but the sad truth is I am the only person who cares for myself.

I don't care about the fans. I don't care if they bash me. Pero masakit pala talaga pag nasampal na sa'yo ang katotohanang hindi ka kayang ipaglaban ng pamilya mo sa gitna ng kaguluhan. Your family is supposed to be your shield. They're supposed to protect you at all costs... Pero bakit... Bakit parang iba ata? Did Mom blame me for Dad's death too, just like Kaedy did? Meron rin ba siyang hinanakit sa akin?

My heart crashed into pieces. Pilit ko itong pinupulot at inaayos, pero nauuwi lang sa pagkasugat ng aking kamay. Is this normal? I thought loving a guy would be my first heartbreak, but I was wrong.

But on the other hand, I feel happy. Pilit ko paring tinitingnan ang positibong bagay. I promised Daddy I'd protect Kaedy at all costs, and here I am, taking all the blame that was supposed to be hers and shielding her from criticism. Matapang naman siguro ako... Kaya siguro nangyayari ang lahat ng ito dahil alam nilang matapang ako. But I'm breaking... Sino ngayon ang bubuo sa akin kung iyong mga taong gusto kong buohin ako ay sila pa mismo ang bumasag sa puso ko.

Hindi ako nanatili ng matagal sa bahay para hintayin ang aking ticket. We stayed at a hotel lalo na't may mga fans ring inaabangan ako sa labas ng subdivision. They've gone mad... They badly want to hurt me. Wala na akong alam kung anong takbo ngayon sa social media, but knowing the fan's mindset, they're willing to turn their backs when things get complicated.

May mga fans pala talagang susuportahan ka lang pag tama ang nagagawa mo pero kung nagkamali ka, isa rin sila sa tatalikod sa'yo.

Sinamahan ako ni Mommy na manatili muna sa hotel while Kaedy got left in our house with Manang Letty. Mom hired some men to protect us later at the airport.

"You can come back here if the issue is already dead, Keyla," ani Mommy sa garalgal na boses.

Hindi ako umimik, simpleng pagtango lamang ang ginawa. What's the purpose of talking when no one is willing to listen to my side anyway? It's tiring.

"Papadalhan nalang kita ng pera roon," she added. "Plus Mama and Papa missed you... Maybe this is the right time for you to take a break from modeling industry, right?"

I nodded again while my tears fell uncontrollably. Why are you so unfair when it comes to me, Mom? What have I done to deserve this kind of pain?

Mommy wiped her tears and looked away.

Noong gumabi na ay nagtungo na kami sa airport. I just wore a fitted long sleeve and black eyeglasses to cover my swollen eyes, paired with dark jeans and black boots.

Pinalibutan kami ng dalawang malalaking bouncer habang naglalakad lalo na't nagdagsaan agad ang mga reporter. Yumuko ako habang nakahalukipkip, sa aking likuran naman ay ang mga gwardyang tumulong na rin na bantayan ako.

"Putangina ka, Keyla! Bitch ka! Fuck you! Mamatay kana!"

"Malandi ka! Makati! Higad!"

The bashers were already screaming when they noticed my presence. Kahit naririnig ko naman sila, nagmistula akong bingi at hindi nalang iyon binigyan ng pansin. I'm used to criticism anyway...

"Miss Lucille, tumatakas ba si Keyla? Ibig sabihin ba nito ay guilty ang anak niyo?"

"Interview lang Keyla! Anong masasabi mo sa issue? Guilty ka ba?"