Hollywood Heartthrob

25

25
Before You Lie

KENDALL SAT on the frigid bathroom tile, painting over her mint-colored nails with black polish. She knew she should have removed the paint underneath first, but she didn't care. Lately she found herself not caring about anything.

The shower was running as Kendall painted her nails, waiting for Ryan to leave the house. She had hardly slept at all that night as the man she once thought she knew slept soundly beside her. A knock sounded on the door and Kendall stiffened, holding her breath. "I'm going now, Kendall. Stay safe. I love you."

"Stay safe."

Kendall's stomach churned. She was in a constant state of uneasiness and anxiety. It ate away at her, destroying her from the inside out like a parasite. She muttered a weak 'goodbye' loud enough for Ryan to hear. As soon as she heard the front door close, Kendall shut the water off and exited the bathroom.

Her hands shook as she carefully stepped into her car. The air inside the vehicle suffocated her—it smelled just like Ryan. His cologne lingered in the car and made every part of Kendall's body ache. It was almost as if he were next to her, telling her not to leave.

Without a particular destination in mind, Kendall started the car and pulled out of the driveway. She drove mindlessly, unaware of any turns or stops she would make. A while later, Kendall's subconscious lead her to Phoenix's apartment.

She knew Phoenix was still mad, but where else would she go?

Kendall made her way up to Phoenix's condo and hesitantly knocked on the door. It swung open suddenly after a few moments. Phoenix stood at the door, her eyes instantly narrowing at Kendall. "I don't want to see you," she said bluntly before beginning to close the door.

Kendall stopped her halfway. "Wait," she said shakily, trying her best not to cry. She was sick of crying, but she couldn't help it. "I have nowhere else to go."

Phoenix opened the door once again and took in Kendall's disheveled appearance. She looked exhausted. The area around her eyes were dark and sunken in, and her bright green eyes that usually danced and twinkled were void of all emotion except sadness. "Oh my God. You look awful." Phoenix stepped aside, inviting Kendall in. "What happened?"

Kendall could hardly speak as she sat next to Phoenix on her couch. "Ryan . . . he . . ."

Phoenix's brows furrowed. "Are you scared of him?"

Kendall nodded slightly and proceeded to describe what had happened two days prior with Phoenix giving her a look of disbelief the entire time.

"You need to fucking leave him, Kendall. This shit is serious."

Kendall looked down at her fingers and played with her newly painted nails. The glossy finish of her black nail polish was almost reflective. "I'm afraid that if I do, he'll try to hurt himself again," she spoke quietly.

"So what if he does? It's not your job to keep him happy." Phoenix stood up from the couch. "We'll figure something out together, but right now you need rest." Phoenix left the room and came back with bottled water and a blanket. She handed them to Kendall. "Stay as long as you need."

And so Kendall did. She slept the entire day, and for the first time in a long time, she was relaxed.

Kendall had woken up at sunset. She walked to the large window and stood in front of it, admiring the different hues of reds, pinks, and oranges smeared across the sky. The warm colors made her feel safe and comforted. In that moment, there was nothing Kendall had to worry about. It was just her and the golden sun that stretched over the horizon.