Want You Gone

[Epilogue: GLaDOS]

---Quick note!---

So that there is no confusion: This chapter will be in GLaDOS's first-person point of view. Unlike the rest of the story, where Chell was the narrator, GLaDOS is the narrator of this specific chapter. 

Enjoy!

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"Oh, the years have been so long,

As I dreamt forever...

I've been waiting patiently for you, don't say goodbye...

Please don't say goodbye..."

The mechanical arms were hard at work, meticulously placing panels, building rooms, arranging  apparatus in different combinations, new patterns, seemingly at random. All of it, followed a very specific, very defined algorithm. Under my control, nothing was 'random.' I could tell anyone who would bother to ask, how I run my facility. It may seem complicated, but it was in fact, quite simple. Nothing was out of my control. 

"Now that I'm awake, I hope you will find me

If you want our cake, I'll bake.

Did you bring the eggs, I'll mix in the sugar for you, don't say goodbye...

Sweet, don't say goodbye..."

I did it all in the name of science. It was only nature, that after all I had done to make sure that everything was under control, someone came along to ruin it. And for what, fun? 

A human's definition of fun was an odd one. But I could not blame them. They were meant to tear things apart, to ruin everything; just as I was programmed to continue testing. It was only when she had awoken, I realized, I could not control everything. 

"I was always fond of you, although you're not clever...

You will never know how much I care, don't say goodbye...

Please, don't say goodbye..."

It was then as the lift rose slowly, and Chell pressed herself to the glass, crying out, that I came to appreciate that I could not control everything. Part of me didn't even want to try anymore. She and I both knew that although I could try, some things were best left out of our hands. 

I did, however, have control over the way I bid her farewell. I almost didn't want to. I didn't want to say goodbye. It was clear that she did not want to either, but I knew that it was best for her. Did I make a mistake? Most likely. What she would face out there, I did not know, and I could not control. 

And what did I do? I'd convinced her as she left that I still hated her, after all that we had been through. Of course, I didn't, but a part of me though that pretending that I did would soften the blow a little bit, for me, at least. As she left the facility, I made sure to have the turrets sing her one of the various songs that I had written in my mind for her. 

Writing up music, singing aloud to myself in my spare time, it seemed like the most human thing I could possibly do. Since my self-discovery, it became even more clear, why sometimes, I felt more human than machine.