sorrows and woes - klaus baudelaire

the vile village

FOR BEATRICE

WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER

I FELT BREATHLESS

NOW, YOU ARE

•••••••••••••

NATALIA SHIFTED UNCOMFORTABLY IN THE BACKSEAT OF MR. POE'S CAR. She looked out the window at the plain, flat landscape and sighed. They had been driving for hours to the middle of nowhere and all four children were uncomfortable,  bored, and antsy. They were uncomfortable by the fact that they were all squished together in the backseat of Mr. Poes' tiny car. They were bored because there was nothing to do on their long car trip except listen to Mr. Poe talk about his job at Mulctuary Money Management and look out the window.

And they were antsy for a number of reasons. One of the reasons they were antsy was that their friends, the Quagmire triplets, were still kidnapped by a notorious villain. Another reason was the mystery behind the letters VFD, which was the name of the town where they were headed. But the reason that made them the antsiest of all was that they had no clue if Count Olaf was following them again or when he would strike next.

Mr. Poe coughed and then commented, "I must say this car trip has been interminably long. Who knew the Hinterlands were so far away?"

"That's why they're called the Hinterlands," Klaus muttered, annoyed at Mr. Poes' lack of knowledge.

"Nobody likes a backseat driver, Klaus. Be sure to tell me when that turn is coming up," Mr. Poe said as he drove past a sign that said 'Turn Coming Up.'

Sunny pointed at the sign and babbled something which meant, 'Missed it.'

Mr. Poe coughed again and again until he finally cleared his throat and excitedly shouted, "'It takes a village to raise a child.' What a lovely aphorism. An aphorism is a phrase that can sound mysterious, but, in fact, is very wise."

"We know what aphorism means," Violet grumbled.

"Oh, well, then perhaps you'll know that this one means that the responsibility of raising young people belongs to every member of a community and that's exactly what's going to happen to you in the village of VFD. Instead of having just one guardian, who could be murdered or end up in cahoots with a villain, you'll have hundreds of people caring for you all at once. What could go wrong?"

"Everything's already gone wrong," Klaus snapped at the banker. "We've lost our friends twice."

"Yes, well..." Mr. Poe started before he realized Klaus did have a point and reached into his glove compartment, "Would you look at this brochure? It has pictures."

Natalia noticed that Klaus had an angry look plastered on his face and began to rub his arm as a way to comfort him. Klaus slightly relaxed and smiled down at the redhead as she leaned her head on his shoulder and looked at pamphlet Violet was holding.

"An entire village will be in charge of us? That's a lot of people," The inventor commented.

"I imagine they'll draw lots like in that wonderful Shirley Jackson story. Normally, I prefer a more traditional family structure but for some unknown reason, neither the individual guardian or the academic institution is working for you."

"The reason isn't unknown," Klaus argued. "The reason is Count Olaf."

"He follows us everywhere," Violet added.

"He kidnapped the Quagmires," Natalia reminded.

"Those poor twins."

"Triplets," Violet corrected.