Losing Our Battles- A Vikklan, Merome and Poofless Story

⋐Chapter 28 [Jerome]⋑

Jerome's P.O.V.

"Mitch!?" I called into the otherwise empty house, having just opened the front door with the spare key under the mat. My voice was shaking and I wasted no time in running up the stairs to his bedroom, desperate to know if I wasn't too late. I was terrified to think that I was.

I couldn't help but scream. The bathroom looked like a murder scene, blood everywhere, Mitch's body slumped against the bathtub, completely still. The cuts were no longer bleeding, puddles under the cuts indicating exactly how long he had been lying there, bleeding out. The text had been sent only 15 minutes earlier but I knew I was already too late- he was gone.

"No... no..." I breathed, falling to my knees. My trembling fingers reached out to touch his cheek but there was only a tiny amount of warmth left and I knew he had been dead for a while. "Mitch please... I thought it was getting better..."

I called the police because it was the only thing I could think of to do, sobbing quietly into the phone as the dispatcher asked me questions about where I was, who Mitch was, what had happened and if there was anything I could do for him. I could barely even tell them that I knew Mitch was dead, long dead, and that CPR would do nothing for him. I couldn't stop looking at him, eyes half open, blank eyes staring at nothing. Sobbing I wanted to leave, but I couldn't move.

They arrived only 5 minutes later, calling through the open door but I didn't have the strength to reply. The dispatcher had hung but and my phone was now on the floor, covered in blood, and I couldn't remove my eyes from Mitch's face. My heartbeat was slow, fingers trembling.

"Hello?" An officer called, walking into the bathroom. "Ah, right."

I turned my eyes to him, shaking and scared.

"Patient deceased, one in shock." Those words didn't really register but I know they did move me, getting me to my feet, out of the bathroom and sitting on his bed. I could still see Mitch, lying in the bathroom. There was some commotion, people coming and going, someone trying to talk to me. I blinked, kind of coming back to reality.

"Can you tell me your name?" Someone asked, standing right in front of me. I nodded slowly and they sighed in relief, probably glad that I was responding now.

"Jerome." I whispered, wringing my hands.

"Alright Jerome, can you tell me what happened? What's your relationship to this boy, who is he, is there family we can contact?"

"His name is Mitch and I'm his fri- boyfriend. We met in hospital when he attempted last time." They nodded, writing something down. "His parents and siblings live here too but I don't know their numbers."

"He's attempted before then?" I nodded quietly, still shaking. "Do you know his last name? And what's your last name too, we may need to contact you again."

"Hughes. And my last name's Aceti." They continued to write.

"Okay Jerome, we're going to try and contact his family and close off the house so we can conduct an investigation, so you're going to have to leave." They said. "Just hang out in front until they get here."

"I think... I think I'm just gonna go." I mumbled, my eyes trailing back over to Mitch. "I don't want to be here. I just... I can't."

"That's alright." They placed a hand on my shoulder. "We have your number now, if we need you we'll contact you."

I nodded.

Was this real? I didn't know.

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It was mostly shock at first, I think. I was in a daze as I walked and walked and walked with no direction, ending up in a place I didn't recognise. I was completely lost in a part of town I had never visited, numb, alone, and so scared because I felt so lost now. Mitch had been my sole reason for trying to get clean and stay clean and now that he was gone... I didn't know what to do.

Slumping down against a wall in an alleyway, out of the view of the public, I buried my head in my hands. What could I do? Was there anything I could do? I eventually just broke down into sobs, unable to keep everything in any longer. I sobbed into my hands for a couple of hours until I just slumped against the wall and stared up at the sky. The light pollution was too much to see the stars but I wished I could see them because I was sure there was a new one up there, watching over me somewhat. It was a happy thought.

I managed to sleep a bit, a few hours at most and waking up every time I slipped into a deeper sleep, but it did clear my head a little. All I could think about was Mitch. I thought everything had been getting better, maybe not at home, but better enough that he wasn't being pushed to the edge again, that he wouldn't try to end his life again. I was totally wrong though, and had been shown that clearly. Because he was gone.

I hadn't really been expecting to come across anyone I knew considering I was on the wrong side of the city, so it was a bit of surprise when I wandered across one of my old buddies- homeless and drug addicted just like me. It took him a moment to realise it was me but when he did I knew at once that he was high, voice slurring and happy.

"J'rome!" He yelled, throwing his arms up. "My man! What're you doing back 'ere! Come 'ere, come 'ere, come have some fun!"

I considered turning him down for just a moment but then I decided against it- fuck it. I wanted to forget everything that had happened over the last day, I wanted to forget that Mitch was gone. He handed me a clear baggie of white powder, plus a syringe filled with another drug.

I held them in my hands, staring down at them. I knew you shouldn't mix drugs but right that second would it really matter? If I overdosed, who would care? I had no one left, no life, no one to live for. No family, no Mitch. No one to be there for, to help build their life back up. If I died, would anyone miss me?

I knew the answer, and the answer was no.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, hand fitting into mine just as I remembered. "I didn't want you to follow me."

"I know you didn't." I breathed back, brushing hair from his forehead so I could look into those beautiful hazel eyes again. "But I wasn't going to stay there without you. You made me feel something for the first time in a long time."

His hand was gently placed over top of my heart and he managed to smile.

"I love you Jerome." He finally whispered, burying his head in my shoulder. "This isn't how I wanted it to end, but if it's this way then I'm not going to complain."

I leaned down and kissed Mitch again, lips capturing his gently.

"I love you too Mitch." I said, smiling. "So, so much."