Helplessly Falling For You: Camren

Chapter 28: Part II

Lauren Jauregui’s POV

Monday, July 30th, 2012

It was already growing dark and I hadn’t talked to Camila all day. I’ve been refraining myself from texting her. If I wanted my feelings for her to lessen and eventually disappear, I can’t keep texting her so often. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think about her any less. Truthfully, I can’t stop thinking about her. Not since I met her, and especially after we kissed. I definitely can’t stop replaying that in my head.

I had spent the day with my siblings, catching up with them and even discussing about my parents. There were no tears involved. Just reminiscing about all the fun times we had. The time my mom was doing laundry and she fell into the laundry basket and she laughed so hard afterward she peed herself. No lie. She really did pee herself. It wasn’t a puddle or anything but she did legit pee herself.

The time we got a scary Halloween mask and put it in their bedroom and faked a body on the bed, scaring the shit out of my dad. He ended up bitching about it but still laughed. He was just mad that we got him, since he claims he has no fear of anything. But I wonder, was he scared when those people took them? If he wasn’t scared then, is he scared now? If he even is still alive, what are they doing to him?

This is where I stop thinking. I don’t want to cry. I don’t want to think about what they could be doing to them both, or what they did. When I don’t want to think about this anymore, I think of Camila.

Absentmindedly, I unlocked my phone and opened up our chat, my fingers started typing up a message.

Hey, Camila. Haven’t heard from you today, just wondering how you’re doing?

I watched the line disappear and reappear, contemplating whether or not to send it. I mean, she hasn’t texted me, she could but she hasn’t.

I press send anyway and type up another message.

I miss you.

I sigh, knowing I shouldn’t have added that last part and put my phone in my pocket.

I wasn’t done reminiscing on the pastime I spent with my parents so as I wait for Camila’s reply, I drown myself in music. For too long I’ve avoided thinking about them. I turn off all the lights in my room but only leave on the black lights and start to play songs my mom would play all the time when she cleans or cooks.

First off, Jump by Van Halen.

I needed a song that, well... would make me want to jump and dance around my room. The beat starts automatically and I can almost see my mother in front of me dancing with a wooden spoon in her hands, pretending it’s a microphone, and telling me, “This is how it’s done, Lauren,” and would proceed to dance and prance around in the kitchen. I thought the house would burn down for sure.

I can picture my dad rolling his eyes at my mom’s silliness but still admiring her juvenile behavior. He would always want to seem like the normal one but we all knew he was the biggest goofball.

As Van starts to sing I can picture it all happening.

I get up, and nothing gets me down.

You got it tough. I've seen the toughest around.

And I know, baby, just how you feel.

You've got to roll with the punches to get to what's real.

I’m spinning in my room, swaying my hips, humming and feeling the beat. Picturing my mother going up to my dad and pulling him into the kitchen. He tries to hide a smile but ends up failing. He wants to give in, but doesn’t just yet.