Belief in Miracles (completed)

Chapter 25: Summer

25 Summer

Sebastian's lips were like fire against my own, awakening parts of me I'd thought to be long dead. My entire body shivered with everything other than cold, and I pressed into him as his tongue devoured mine, his hand skimming shamelessly up and down my side. I wanted him with a desperation I'd never known, and I'd been waiting for him to kiss me like this, but deep down, I knew this wasn't what he wanted. It was okay for one thing to lead to another— a tickle fight landing us in a compromising position, but it was another for me to let him throw away his vow over a moment of lust.

But God, he was so hard to resist. Literally and figuratively. The bulge I could feel digging into my thigh promised a long, happy night, and I wanted it. But I knew Sebastian would never forgive himself. I remembered what Tom said about Molly manipulating him— the guilt he'd felt the next morning. I did not want to be another source of regret for him, no matter how lost to himself he was at present.

"Sebastian..." I breathed against his lips, and groaned as his hand shifted inward to mold over my breast— my real one. He kneaded it gently, his fingertips making a small circle in the center to drive me absolutely nuts, and it was all I could do to keep my sanity intact. "Sebastian, you have to stop."

He responded with a sigh into my mouth, his hand working magic and the bulge getting harder, leaving me aching and needy, but also firmly resolved not to do this to him. When he leaned away from me a moment later, I was shaking and gasping. He was too, I noticed, but he didn't reach for the cannula, just breathed heavily as he looked down on me with a blurred combination of love and intense desire.

"Bas...?"

Without meeting my eyes, he laid a finger over his lips, then, without a word, he reached down and slid my bra upwards to rest beneath my chin. I froze beneath his scrutiny, my mouth going dry as his eyes drank me in. Glancing down, I looked at my breast, then the spot where the other should have been. The scars had been horrendous after they'd removed it, and in a desperate act of self-pity, I'd had a small bouquet of roses tattooed over them. A bright green hummingbird was peeking up from the center of them.

Sebastian didn't speak. His eyes skimmed over me, expression unreadable as he raised a hand to slide over the tattoo. Goosebumps broke out over me in full force as he gently touched the skin, his lips parted, chest rising and falling heavily.

"I know it's weird." I said softly. "I was having self-esteem issues, and I thought it would help, but really, it probably just looks ridiculous. I'm sorry."

At last, his eyes snapped to me, and his brows furrowed. "Sorry?"

I nodded. "That I'm not perfect for you."

His lips parted in a look of stun as he stared at me. Very gently, he leaned back down to hover over me, his lips barely an inch from mine. "Summer, I've never seen a more perfect, beautiful woman. Everything I learn about you takes me newly by surprise, and your beauty now has taken my breath away."

I didn't know what to say, and didn't have a chance to say it anyway before he molded his hand back over my breast and pressed his lips into mine. My mind was swirling with a thousand different things, and each one came back to stopping him, no matter how much I didn't want to.

"If you mean that, then you have to stop." I said against his lips, and he pulled back to hover over me.

"Why?"

"Because you made a promise, and I won't be the source of you breaking it."

"But you're the one always trying to get me to kiss you."