The Key to My Heart (Or to Baz's Diary)

The Sun Will Shine Again

Baz

After I'm deep enough into the woods, my feet begin to slow. I take in the sound of leaves rustling, the scent of grass and crisp air.

Hopefully I can find something big enough to last me a while. I don't want to have to be out feeding for another while if I can help it.

Simon should be inside for a while if anything. He won't be coming after me anyways, there's no reason for him to go looking for me when he's so caught up in his book upstairs.

I'm walking around mindlessly when the thought pops into my head. It's reckless of me really- to even allow the possibility to enter my mind. Now that it's circulating through me I can't help but contemplate it.

I want to tell him my mind whispers. And I realize for the first time that maybe it wouldn't be so bad to let Simon know how I feel about him when he's shown nothing but kindness this entire trip. Maybe I should just put it all out there- expecting to get shut down.

As long as this secret is no longer a secret- I think I'll feel a lot better. The worst thing that could happen is Simon's reaction to the news. After that, it doesn't matter who he tells or who finds out. I only care for what he'll think of my love.

Twigs snap beneath my feet, leaves crunching as I pad through the brush, hoping to actually spot something despite how loud I'm being.

Slowing down, I slither behind a tree with a particularly large trunk. Peeking my head out from behind the bark I wait silently as a deer grazes on the little vegetation that can be found left in this chilly weather.

It's a female and not fully grown yet, though not quite a baby. That should be able to hold me over for two weeks if anything. I'm able to survive on normal food most of the time anyways.

I crouch down cautiously and pull out the kitchen knife from my shoe, practicing a throwing motion before aiming it at the creature.

A quick flick of the arm and it's done, though the little yelp that the animal lets out kills me a little. Even after the numerous times I've done this over the years.

The deer takes a few minutes for me to drain. Even then, I'm not able to take all of it's blood. Most is enough to fill me up more than I need.

Fiona is going to be pissed about the blood I've gotten on her knives as always, even though I've made it clear that I can't catch a deer without it. That I need to feed and this is the only way that allows it to happen.

Father doesn't really care for the most part. He knows about everything I've been through as a vampire, and as long as I make sure the animals aren't left in his direct line of sight, he doesn't bring up the subject.

Feeling a lot less exhausted than before, I begin to walk back in the direction of the mansion at a leisurely pace. It's only a few seconds before I spot a tree stump and make a move to sit there.

I've got nothing better to do, so why not spend a bit of the day outside, absorbing the beautiful world I'm surrounded by. Letting the sounds of birds and the breeze swallow up my every thought, the sun shining through the brush, I'm at peace.

Simon

Malcolm is ready to leave the room when I stop him.

"Do you know where Baz is?" I question, having nothing better to do.

Malcolm smiles softly and tells me, "Baz was heading for the back door last time I saw him." before turning away and padding down the steps. I wait a few seconds before following down the stairs.