I'll just leave then

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"I'll just leave then Sherlock.  Since you can't do anything, but blame me for all the pain I caused trying to save all YOUR lives!"  I remark lividly, it's been about seven months since I came back and that's all he does; yell at me for faking my death even though he faked his. 

"Anistyn I didn-"  He's cut off by me slamming the flat door.  Storming down the stairs in seething rage just as Ms. Hudson innocently makes her way up in curiosity of the noise.

"Oh dear, what hap-"

"I got fed up with Sherlock's constant yelling at me, so he'll have to find another flatmate, preferably not a sibling as we all are temperamental."  I cut Ms. Hudson off, and she nods and mumbles something to herself about a letter to give Sherlock, but I don't give it a thought.  I'm not his keeper.  The landlady scurries back down the stairs and into her flat, and I head out the door not sure of where I'm headed, anywhere but here.

(Sherlocks POV)

I can only listen after she slams the door, to hear her cut Ms. Hudson off mid-sentence.  And to hear the front door slam shut loudly.  I slump into my chair and think.

"Sherlock?"  Comes my landlady's voice on the other side of the door, I don't bother to say anything as it is a waste of breath.  She opens the door, looking at me sadly muttering something about sibling rivalry.  "Sherlock I wrote this when we thought Anistyn was dead.  I was going to slip it under your door, but I just forgot I guess."  She kindly hands me a letter, and leaves.

I stare at it awhile longer, debating to open it or not, wondering if it's just all sentimental rubbish.  I open it quickly to unfold a price of paper and read it.

Sherlock, 
I know this must be hard for you and all, and don't act like it isn't because I know deep down you care and you're hurting.  But Sherlock, think of when you were little, or when her face lit up into a smile.  When her eyes gleamed with joy of seeing you get home from being gone for awhile, I know you two used to have a close bond.  When you two shared a true joke, laughing for hours.  I remember those times with my sister, I miss her dearly.  Sherlock, before your sister died she always smiled at me but her smile never reached her eyes.  Remember the time when her smiles reached her eyes, and hold onto that memory.

-Ms. Hudson, Landlady

I quickly tuck the letter into the chair,  I'll look at it again one day.  And unannounced, my thoughts drift to those memories,  the happy ones.  I feel by brows furrow, I thought I deleted all those memories.  And I find myself remembering when I was 15, and Anistyn was about three--

"Sherlock!  Sherlock!  Your home!  Your home!  I missed you terribwy!"  She still had some work to do with better words, but that was all right.  Little Anistyn's dark brunette hair flew behind her as she ran as quickly as her small legs could carry her to me, her big brother.  Her face was young, and a toothy, wide smile flooded her face, making her ocean blue eyes gleam with joy.  I picked her up and walked into our family home, mother was in the kitchen baking something,  father in the sitting room reading the paper. --

That was sentiment, I kept it for some reason.  I should delete it, but I don't have anything I need to make room for.  I won't delete it, not yet at least.  I fold my hands carefully in my lap and stay sitting.  Getting up quickly only to get my violin, I stand by the window she was shot from and play one note, after another and another. 

"Hello John."  I boredly say turning around to see him as he jumps in surprise.

"Sherlock!  I was just comin-"

"Yes your daily routine, I know it now.  It's not secret or anything.  Get up, take a shower,  get dressed, go to work, and once your done with work you come here if you have time."  I cut him off.

"Actually, well..  Yes, sure I came here to check on you and Anistyn...  Where is Anistyn?"  He asks looking around for my not present sister.

"Anistyn Holmes is not present at the moment John."  I reply quoting my sister from when I first saw her sitting outside the flat, just waiting for me.

"What did you do."

"Why do you people always assume I did it!  Oh yes, that's right.  Because you all are idiots, always assuming things."  I rapidly retort, and the ex- army doctor crosses his arms.

"Blaming everyone today aren't you."  Not replying, I instead continue on playing my violin, but louder. 

"I'll just ask Ms. Hudson then."  He shouts over my playing, and leaves the room once I don't reply.  This will be a long day.

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