Hobbit x reader oneshots

How They Make You Happy

How they make you happy

GIF by k-eke

Thorin: Will take you out somewhere to dance. Doesn’t matter when or where he will stop whatever it is he is doing and take you out somewhere nice.

“Put on your good dress.” “All of them are my good dresses ya doof.” “Mahal.” Sighs. “Put the blue one on.” Snickers. “You only like the blue one because it’s easy to take off.”

Fili: Will take you somewhere quite and talk it out. This boy will then pamper you and do what it takes to make you laugh. Be it being the biggest goof ball or merely holding you against your will and tickling you senseless.

“Get back here!” “No! Your going to tickle me!” “And it makes you laugh so get over here!” (Dwalin was not happy by being tackled down by the two of you)

Kili: Like his brother will take you somewhere quite but instead of talking he makes funny faces. Blowing his cheeks out and wiggling his ears. Making fishy faces. He once even put on his mothers dress and walked around your room pretending to be a very stuck up noble you two sometimes make fun off.

“Is it working?”  Giggling. “Try pulling your leg up higher then we’ll see.” “Why is it always me?” Thorin walked in on Kili striking the most stupid pose is his moms best red dress. Needless to say he was sort of impressed at how he could balance in those heels. Let alone fit them.

Dwalin: Will legit throw you over one shoulder and hall you to the nearest pub. The two of you will down whisky and eat sweets until bursting. Then the two of you will stumble home and either talk about what made you so upset or crash on the couch.

“Better Lassie?” “Hmph. Wine. Then we’ll talk.” “Who do I need to fight.”  Stumbles onto the couch and spills half the glass. “The stupid one.”

Balin: The two of you will either sit in silence or talk it out. Which ever works for you. All you know is that afterwards, no matter what, you go out and get a bite to eat and spend whatever the rest of the day is sitting out side and over looking the River Running. And whoever made you upset mysteriously has a bad rash or illness they need to look after.

“And you said it was the one with red hair and golden clasps?” “Yes. But I don’t see why this is really necessary.”  Nods his head. “Yes. He had a dragon shaped cuff right?” “Yes Balin but.” Covers your hand with his. “Don’t worry about it Dear.” You never knew someone could go so red after explaining exactly where his rash had went. From hand to. U hem moving on.

Bofur: Will play music and dance an sing until you burst out laughing. This is when he pulls out the raunchiest of  jokes and the stupidest puns. He wont stop until your rolling on the floor and unable to breathe.

“What kind of trees to fingers grow on?” Gives a little flourish. “Palm trees!” “Bofur I swear-” “What? That i’m the most handsome and funny dwarf you ever had the pleasure of meeting? Why yes I am.” Chuckling. “Get over here ya big goof.”

Bombur: The two of you will stay home and chill together. Nothing out of the ordinary. He will bake a few things and that’s it. You’ll talk it over and have a good time. 

“Bomber did you hear that Rayner has gotten sick?” “Oh. Did he do you still want to make him some of your soup even after he did?” Kicks a small packet under the table without you noticing. “Maybe.”

Bifur: The language barrier is something that still gets between the two of you from time to time seeing as he will still lapse into Khuzdul when he’s mad or upset but you make do. He want’s to go fight whoever made you upset right on the spot. It makes for some hilarious times but it sometimes is just better for you to talk and take a nap with him.

“Where are they!?” “Bifur please!”  Is halfway out the door. “What?” “As much as I want to let you go fight them l I can’t let you do it without pants.”

Dori: Tea fixes everything right? Well yes. And no. Some ginger tea when your stomach is upset or Chamomile to help you sleep is fine. When the two of you slip laxatives into a cup of tea... Maybe not so much.

“You think that’s enough?” “Only one way to find out.” Door opens. “Hello! I’m so glad you could make it on such a short notice.” Poor dwarf barley made it back out the door.

Nori: Where do you think he got his mischievous side from? He will take you to wherever the person who made you upset is and the two of you will bombard them with pies, raw eggs, and feathers.

Laughing so hard you can’t breathe. “Y/n! You have to be quite or they’ll find out where were at!” Hucks another pie but also manages to give away where you’re hiding because he yelled “Eat this!” Way to loud.

Ori: Way more gentle in his approach. He will talk to you first and make sure you are alright before the two of you settle down to read a book together.

“You talked to them again didn’t you?” “Maybe. Would you like this book or this one?” “Did you at least stop before they started crying this time?” “No. Let’s read this one. I haven’t read it in a while.”

Gloin: Will also try to fight whoever made you upset. But before that he makes sure that you are absolutely ok. That the two of you have talked things over and what you want to happen to the person who made you so upset.

“Do we still have that rope?” “Yes.. Why?” “Tie them up in a tree and leave them there”...”Put a knife just out of their reach to we don’t need Thorin yelling at us again.” “Sometimes I wonder who the real cruel one between us is Y/n” “Me clearly.”

Oin: Whisky. It solves everything. From forgetting your problems to making your loved ones talk.

“And then what happend?” “He. He.” You shake your head.”He told me I had no place there! I’m the one running it.” You pour yourself another shot. “Take it easy Y/n. We still have all night.”