IX. PHILOPHOBIA

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Philophobia: (n). the fear of love or of becoming emotionally connected with another person

In the days following their confessions session, O'Shea and Erik finally committed to having a regular schedule that was conducive to both her therapy and their personal needs.

Mondays were used to discuss the previous week's activities, whether or not they were successful, and to plan out new activities for the upcoming week. Those activities would then be implemented on Tuesday while Wednesday was a quiet day.

During the quiet day, Erik would see other patients, if any, or meet with Skylar to discuss upcoming research projects. Thursdays were used for mid-week check-ins. O'Shea would contact Erik if she wasn't feeling like herself or if she felt like the particular week's activity was a failure. They alternated Friday and Saturdays for personal time outside of the office. During this time, they would go on movie or dinner dates or just chill at each other's houses, cuddling or playing video games.

Their relationship was flourishing at a healthy rate and while excited for her best friend, Skylar couldn't help feeling a pang of jealousy.

Erik watched her intensely as she paced the floor of his office, convinced that she was about to create a completely new design.

"Are you gonna talk to me or are you gonna put a hole in my floor?"

She stopped and faced him, her eyes riddled with conflict.

"I don't know how to explain it without sounding like a bitter bitch," she said, finally taking a seat in the chair across from him. It was Friday so she was dressed down in a black tank that read "Thug Life" in white Old English writing, camouflage cargo pants, and black gladiator sandals. Her curly mane haloed her face and big, gold bamboo earrings with her name in the middle adorned her ears.

"Girl stop all that and tell me what's wrong so I can help fix it," Erik fussed, coming around to sit on the corner of his desk in front of her.

"Well, I know I was the main one that wanted you two together, but now that it's happening, I guess I'm a bit jealous. Not because you both are finally happy and in a healthy space to pursue a relationship, but because I want the same thing and right now. It's hard."

"Elaborate," Erik said, removing his glasses so that their eyes met.

Sky sighed heavily before continuing, "Lately, I've found myself missing Monica. I mean, yeah, our relationship was toxic 80% of the time, but things were good when we were on good terms. She showered me with love and adoration and she was someone that I could call mine, even if it was only for a limited time. Occasional hookups are cool, but I miss being in love and the thought of pursuing something of that nature with Oya has me TERRIFIED," she stomped, pushing his pen from the desk so that it rolled onto the floor.

"For the last time, would you calm down?" Erik's voice was stern yet soft as he stared into her big doe eyes.

"I can't help it, E," she confessed looking up at him. "It's quite obvious that Oya is interested, but I don't know if I'm ready to go back down that road again. Not to mention, she wants a full-on domme/sub relationship. Monica and I only did a few scenes during our time together. I'm nobody's domme."

"You are," he said frankly. "Your dick is bigger than mine most of the time, you just don't seem to realize it. What are you afraid of?"

"Losing my license."

"Is that all?"

"Yes."

"Liar."

Skylar furrowed her brows, shooting him a glare that made him square his shoulders and glare right back.

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