Forbidden - Dean Winchester x Reader

Chapter 5

Oh boy was it hard.

Dean had fallen in love with you, without even realizing it, and he could not do anything about it (not yet at least) before he decided what he would do with her.

Her.

His wife. Lisa. They've been married for at least two years and he'd been dating her for another two. 

He loved her, yes, but that was probably in the beginning of their relationship. If you asked Dean he'd say that he still loved her after their marriage but that was half the truth.

When they first got married everything was alright but then Dean started feeling as if things had started to change or maybe that's how they were before the marriage but he had not realized it. And it wasn't him that had started changing but her.

It happened to be many times that Lisa would be away from home, appearing on some kind of movie or guest starring at some TV show, so Dean did not have the chance to see her very often, and it made him feel as if they were not married and he was alone, no different from how he used to feel two years ago, before they got married. And when she was home... well, that was a whole different story. She was distant and didn't talk much, she said she felt tired, Dean sometimes though thought otherwise.

And on top of that she seemed not to really care about Dean and how he was, at least that's how Dean saw it. And even though he was not sure about that, there was one thing that he was certain on. And that was that he did not care anymore. 

He tried to. Really. Because he wanted to save his marriage, all that they had with Lisa. Not for him but for her.

Despite the fact that many times she was "tired" and seemed to not care, she was a good wife (as much as she could be) and, no matter what, she loved him. That was for sure. So Dean could not do that to her. Even if he no longer felt the way she did. 

Not for her at least.

"So did you think about it?" Sam asked Dean as they made their way to their classes.

It was the last period and since the morning Dean had not stopped thinking about you, what he should do with you and his feelings for you, and what he should do with his wife.

"I don't know, Sam. I feel totally fucked up" Dean sighed, rubbing his eyes.

"Well you want to be with her, don't you? I mean you... have feelings for her hm?" Sam asked.

"Yes Sam" Dean let out a defeated sigh "I've had for a long time"

"Just... don't make any rush decisions, ok?" Sam said, looking at his brother sympathetically and Dean nodded.

After a while of walking in silence, Dean took in a  deep breath when he approached his classroom. They reached the door and after Sam patted his brother on the shoulder, he made his way to his own classroom, leaving Dean to do what he dreaded most, since the morning.

Giving a lesson and looking at you while trying  to act as if nothing was off and you were just like any other student.

Hard.

~ A few seconds earlier ~

"You. have. to be. kidding me!" Caroline looked at you, eyes wide and mouth agape.

"No Caroline I'm not" you let out a sigh, looking down at your desk as you and all the class were currently waiting for the teacher to come.

And you really weren't looking forward to it.

It would be really hard for you to look him in the eyes without blushing furiously or talking to him properly without stuttering.

And as you waited for him, Caroline looked at you stunned.

You had told her about the dream, after she kept bugging you the whole day and asking you what was going on and why you seemed to get lost in thoughts or when you tried to change the subject when he was mentioned.

"But you definitely have to be kidding me! You had that kind of dream with him!?" she raised her eyebrows.

"Yes Caroline, I did. Now can you please stop mentioning it and stop embarrassing me!?" you whisper-shouted and she opened her mouth to speak but was cut off by the sound of the door opening and Dean coming in.

As soon as he walked in the whole class went silent. Both you and Caroline turned to look at him and as he looked around the room his eyes suddenly stopped on you, as you both locked glances. It was just a few seconds but it seemed really longer, especially with the silence, not to mention kind of awkward with the whole class looking as he stood in the middle of his way to the desk just staring at you, as you did the same. But neither him nor you seemed to realize any of that, so Caroline, after glancing between the two of you, cleared her throat; giving you a look which made you brake your gaze and look down at your book.

Dean blinked a few times, clearing his throat "Hello class" he said and made his way to his desk.
"Hello Mr Winchester" the class said in unison apart from you, who just looked down at your book, and Caroline who would not stop looking at you frowning.

The lesson started and luckily Dean announced that you were not going to have the test.

Fortunately for you, because you wouldn't able to concentrate even in the least bit.

However as the lesson started, time seemed to go by really slowly. You tried to concentrate, take notes and pay attention, however you found it really hard when you looked up from your notes to the blackboard and your eyes would lock with his. Every time you would look down immediately, trying really hard to avoid his gaze. Although many times you felt him looking at you, you thought nothing of it and just believed that it was what you wanted and-

Wait what?

No you didn't... did you?

You shook slightly your head and rubbed your eyes, thankful that Dean could not see you clearly from where he was, since you were seated in the back of the class, Caroline next to you.

You looked down at your notebook, trying to steady your fast-beating heart, when you saw a folded paper being passed to you.

You looked at it and then at Caroline, who made a small sign for you to open it and so you did.

R u ok? -Car

You saw written in it and scribbled down your answer.

Yeah, fine. Don't worry -(Nickname)

And passed it to her, carefully so that Dean would not see (if possible from where he was).

And now u expect me to believe u? -Car

Yes Car believe me. Just u know... him -(Nickname)

Yeah obviously. We can all see that. That's why we r seating here right? So that u can have a better look at him? -Car

Well... maybe. But not in that way Car! -(Nickname)

Yeah, u tell me. Cause u r definitely not staring at his back and drooling over only at that sight. -Car

Shut up Caroline! U know I'm not! -(Nickname)

Yeah right, just remind me to tell cupid that he's getting a raise after the good job he did with you and

She started writing but stopped, as soon as Dean glanced your way, and she pretended to be checking her notes. 

Dean glanced at you suspiciously and then continued his lesson. Before Caroline could write more, you snatched the paper from her hands, folding it and putting it at the end of your notebook. You gave her glare, telling her to focus on the lesson and she just rolled her eyes, doing as you said.

"Nerd" you heard her mumble.

You rolled your eyes and tried to focus on the lesson, in spite of the hardness of it.

Fortunately the lesson ended quickly and after Dean assigned you a paper, you gathered your things and waited for the bell to ring.

"Hey, (Y/n)." you heard a voice say and you turned to your right to look at your long-time-friend and also classmate, Kol Mikaelson who was seating a few seats ahead.

"Yeah Kol?" you asked.

"Do you happen to know when we are to have the project that Mr. Saltzman assigned us finished?" he asked and you frowned.

"Uhm probably by the next time we have a lesson with him. Which is... tomorrow"

"Great. Bloody great!" he said sarcastically.

"I take it that you have not done any of it yet, hm?" you smirked at his reaction.

"Oh no, love. I have in fact writen ten pages and was thinking of adding more tonight that I have free time. You know I like partying hard with homework instead of partying hard at some bar." he said with his English accent.

You laughed and shook your head slightly "Oh come on Kol, you know that if you don't write it then you are not going to get a grade, thus you're going to fail the class" you said giggling.

"Oh come on, love. Don't be so dramatic. You really think that someone with this charm and looks would ever fail?" he asked smirking.

"Of course not. How foolish of me to think such thing" you laughed as he did the same.

"So what are you going to do?" you asked him and he shrugged.

"Eh I don't know. Maybe, you know, ask a really good friend of mine, a really beautiful and sweet girl whom I adore and believe is the best-" he started but you cut him off.

"No, Kol. I'm not doing your project" you said trying to seem serious but still smiling.

"Oh come on, love! Why not?!" he whined, playfully.

"Because!" you said "I'm not doing your project Kol, I have enough homework for my own and almost no time. Sorry but it's no" 

"Really? Come on, love, how can you say no to this eyes?" he said looking at you with puppy-eyes.

"Like that" you said and put the bag on your shoulder and got up as the bell rang.

You walked in front of him, smiling cheekily and he tried to make an angry face although he failed at it when a smile tried to make its way on his face.

"I hate you" he said.

"Oh I know. And I love you too Kol" you shouted so that he could her from where you were, at the door, making your way out with the rest of the students.

Kol chuckled and mumbled "What a girl" as he gathered his things.

Though what you did not see was the glare and hard looks Dean sent you and, mainly, Kol all the while you talked. Not to mention when he called you 'love' or you shouted at him that you loved him. 

He knew that you said it playfully and did not mean it but deep down he felt as if you did mean it and he would be lying if he said it didn't hurt.