Children of Fire (Complete)

seventy-two

Emerson

The last few days took way too long to pass. Gideon wasn't here with me as much as I would have liked, but I understand that he had a lot of things to take care of to get his revenge on Callahan. And as much as I knew he wanted to pull the trigger himself, I couldn't help but be selfish and want that revenge for myself. Sure, Callahan had betrayed Gideon's trust and was planning something against him and his club... but Callahan had essentially ruined my entire fucking life.

He had been the reason my father was fired from his job, the reason he turned to drinking and abuse (of course it had always been inside of him, laying dormant, but it was brought on by the loss of his job). He was the reason Greyson was released from jail. He was the reason that Greyson was gone so often when we were together. Everything bad that had happened to me since I was a young girl was Callahan's fucking fault, so yeah, I felt like I deserved some sort of revenge of my own.

But, of course, I didn't exactly know how to convey that to Gideon. I guess I could have come right out and said it, told him that he didn't deserve to kill the man he had known longer than me-- that I deserved to see the life drain from his eyes by my own hand. I could have sat down with him and beat around the bush, asked him what his plans were exactly and tried to weasel my way into them, but I knew there was no way in hell that Gideon would allow me anywhere near Callahan after what had happened to me.

I also didn't know how to tell Gideon that I was pregnant. Pregnant with his child. Our child. A baby. He had so much on his plate right now that I couldn't just come right out and say it. I had been waiting for the right time to let him know, but it seemed like the only things we talked about these days were revenge, not that I was upset with our topic of discussion, but dammit it was really difficult to just blurt out 'Hey! I'm growing a person inside of me!'.

Speaking of which, growing a person inside of you is absolutely exhausting. Between the constant sickness (I don't know why they call it morning sickness because it should just be called 'all the time sickness'), the loss in appetite yet somehow starving all the time, the exhaustion, and the worry... I spent most of my time sleeping. Gideon thought I was just resting, which I guess I technically was, but I wasn't showing any obvious signs of pregnancy. My boobs weren't swollen yet, so physically I looked normal. Well, as normal as I could with bruising and cuts all over my face. They were still pretty purple, but the edges were fading to a grotesque yellow and my eyes were no longer swollen.

Today was the fourth full day I had spent in the hospital, and the day I was finally able to go back home. Gideon insisted on me staying at the clubhouse until Callahan was taken care of, especially since he knew where we lived, but I had convinced him to let me go home. I didn't see the point, Callahan knew where the clubhouse was, too. I knew Gideon wouldn't let me stay at the house alone, so I figured I was just as safe at home as I would be at the clubhouse. Which was where I found myself now, standing at the front door while Gideon unlocked it for me.

"Home sweet home, baby." He said, turning around to place a kiss on my forehead. I smiled up at him and leaned down to pick up my bag. Before I had the chance to wrap my fingers around it, he had snatched it up and was placing his hand on the small of my back, maneuvering me inside. "You remember what Lindsay said, no strenuous activity and lots of rest." He reminded me.

"Yes, Gideon, I remember." I told him, rolling my eyes. "How could I forget, you won't even let me stand up for longer than a few minutes." I grumbled to myself, plopping down on the couch. It worried me how Gideon would react when I did eventually have the chance to tell him I was pregnant. Did he even want kids? What if he didn't? We hadn't even known each other very long. Sure, we were engaged, but bringing another human into the world? Raising a person together? That was a lot to take in, and I knew if it overwhelmed me it would overwhelm him even more. Could he juggle our relationship, the club, and children?