Lie, Baby, Lie ✔️

chapter twenty-two- mia

Chapter Twenty-Two

My eyes are glued to my phone. I shoved the papers back in the file cabinet and locked it again before Thomas returned to his office, but the evidence is right in front of me and I can't believe what I'm seeing. I'm a few feet away from him, curled up as I read. He's whistling, typing an email, with no clue what I'm doing.

I managed to snap a few photos in the short time I had access to my brother's stuff. I held these forms in my hands, but I still find myself questioning their legitimacy. There's no way it could be photoshopped, yet I still don't know what to make of these pictures.

The first page is an overview. I never knew he was ever in a mental hospital, but the Critt house has always had a few secrets. I was young at the time, ten years old, too young to grasp the situation. My parents probably lied to protect me, but might have hurt me more in the long run.

I skim the words, my curiosity overcoming me.

Patient: Thomas A. Critt (16) was involuntarily committed to the Los Angeles youth psychiatric hospital for a mandatory 72-hour hold. The patient was admitted by his parents at 6:55 pm on Friday, October 29th.

Reason for commitment/history:

-Parents report suspension from the patient's high school after physically assaulting another student. The other boy is in the ICU after suffering severe abrasions to the head and neck. Despite the victim being in stable condition, it appears the patient is disappointed in the outcome of the fight.

-Parents believe the patient is a danger to family members at home, including one younger sister by the name of Mia.

Previous diagnosis: none

Pertinent history:

-The patient was responsible for the death of the family dog at the age of twelve after smothering him. The patient claims it was an accident, but his parents remain unconvinced.

-The patient has been involved in other physical altercations, but none of this severity.

-The patient has not been previously treated for potential mental illnesses before and could be considered hostile.

Following the first image is a series of conversations transcribed. The evolution of Thomas's relationship with his therapist is dramatic. He starts snarky and defensive but eventually crumbles. I see him pleading for an explanation, describing these "impulses".

Right in front of my eyes are confessions.

Confessions expressing a desire to hurt me, our parents. Confessions about killing animals. Confessions about the assault. I know Thomas is volatile, and a killer, but I always assumed it was an evolutionary process. I never realized it started so soon when he was so young.

When I finally see the doctor's conclusion, I feel like I've been punched in the gut.

Antisocial personality disorder. Psychopathic tendencies. Sadistic tendencies.

It fits. It fits so well I'm not sure why I never considered it before.

My brother isn't who I thought, and I can't go around avoiding it anymore. He truly is insane, and he doesn't feel sympathy or even the slightest bit of regret when he murders someone. Hell, judging by these talks, he even likes it. He's cold-blooded, and all those glimmers of kindness I thought I experienced with him may have never been authentic in the first place.