Love Me Anyway

One

There's always a moment when you ask yourself if what you're doing, is right. Most of the time, you are doing it for the greater good, like standing up for yourself or saying something that might offend someone, to prove a point. Then there's the times where you feel like it's you against the world, when all you're doing is standing behind you believe in. But deep down you have that doubt and you ask yourself if it is right. There's always that moment. Do you doubt your ability to do it, or do you just keep doing it without a thought? Do you give up in defeat or do you push, the ones who pushed you, back? Most of the time, you trust the judgment that is right. But what if it's not? What if what you're doing, is something you never thought you'd be doing? What if they told you it was okay, but it really wasn't? That's when you know you misjudged yourself and you were in the wrong. You should have trusted your doubt. There's always that moment, and it's a moment, a simple mental judgment, that can never be changed.

It's like being under a spell. Someone can persuade you into doing, virtually anything, if they do it right. Some people fail, others succeed. In my case, love was the persuasion, and they succeeded.
__________

I was seventeen when I met Frank Iero. It was the middle of the summer and almost 10 am. It was the warm sun that cracked the only window of my basement bedroom, that woke me up. I still thank god that it wasn't my stupid alarm clock. I sat there, just laying, thinking about the most randomness shit. Shit like, what it be like if cats ruled the world, or something, and how badly it would suck for me because I'm allergic, or if it would really be worth getting up and do nothing all day. Unfortunately, my mother answered it without even knowing it.
She came into my room, already dressed for something and looked a little stressed.
"Gerard, get up. I told you last night that we had to up and ready by 10:30. We have plans." She exclaimed. I remembered what she was talking about, I just didn't remember what we were doing.
"I know. I'm getting up. But what are we doing exactly?" I said sleepily.
She looked at me and sighed, "we're having our new neighbors over, remember?"
"Actually, no. That's why I asked." I said bluntly. She rolled her eyes.
"Just get dressed," she sighed and left. I waited until she was up the stairs. When I heard the door close, I got up and looked at my clock. It was only 10:20, so I got back into bed. I figured it would only take me a minuet or so to get ready and it's not like I'm trying to impress anyone. After a few minuets, I heard footsteps come the door and quiet voices. I heard the door open and close a few seconds later. The voices were louder as they stepped into the house and my mother called my brother and I to come greet our visitors . I was just about to go up when I heard Mikey yell from his room.
"Mom, Gerard took my Batman action figure, the very first one!" He yelled. I couldn't help but laugh because I know he left it in one of the boxes from packing. I know, my mother said they were the new neighbors, but really, we had just moved in here a week ago. I, unlike Mikey, finished unpacking the first day.
I was still laughing when my mother called me again. I became annoyed and left my room. When I got up there, there was a woman and what I assumed was her son. They looked a like to me. He had both sides of his head shaved and dyed red. He had a strip of hair that turned into a fringe that shaped perfectly to his face. He had bright green eyes with a hazel ring around them. He had a lip and a nose ring that alternated. He looked a little nervous because he kept playing with the lip ring. It was a little hot but I ignored it.

I was standing next to my mother when she nudged me, "Don't be rude. Introduce yourself." it snapped me out of my gaze of him, that I didn't even know I was in. I looked at her and gave her a slight glare.
"I'm Gerard." I was still a little annoyed.
"Nice to meet you, Gerard. I'm Mrs. Iero, but you can call me Maria. And this is Frank." She gestured towards him and nudged him also.
"Hi." I said and gave a simple wave.
"Hi." He said quietly. He seemed shy.
"Well you guys go play-" My mother started.
"Mom, we don't play. We aren't little kids." Mikey stated.
"Just go do something so Mrs. Iero and I can talk." And with that, they made their way into the kitchen. Mikey scoffed. Frank's mother said something to him that made him blush and become a little angry.
Mikey started to lead into his room when I changed my mind. "Let's go down to my room. It's cooler than Mikey's." I smirked and lead the two to my bedroom. I turned around just in time to see Mikey roll his eyes and softly laughed.

When we got in there, I plopped myself onto my bed and watched Frank observe my room. He was looking at my drawings and posters on my wall. It looked like he was having a hard time looking at them. I couldn't blame him. They only light I liked having was the sunlight that came from my little window.
"Did you draw these?" He finally asked.
"Uh, yeah. I like drawing."
"They're amazing." He said quietly.
"Thank you. Do you like the Misfits?"
He turned around. The sunlight hit his face perfectly and made his eyes look even bigger and more beautiful than before. "Yeah," he smiled, "they're my favorites."
"Do you mind...?" I held up one of they're CDs.
"No, go ahead. 'S your room anyway."
I put the cd in and sat back down on my bed. I noticed that Frank was standing against the wall. "Don't be shy," I chuckled, "come sit." I patted a spot next to me. "Come on. I won't bite, I promise." I smirked. He blushed and came to sit next to me while Mikey sat on the floor. Suddenly, I got an itch for a cigarette. I grabbed my pack, opened the window and lit the cancer stick.
"Gee!" Mikey squealed. "You're not allowed to smoke. Mom already said that-"
"Mikey hush. I smoke in here all the time." I answered. I looked over at Frank. "You want one?"
"Me?" He asked.
I nodded.
"No, I've never smoked before. But thanks, I think."
"It's cool."
"Hey," Mikey started, "did you guys hear about that murder?"
We both shook our heads.
"The news said that someone brutally murdered nine or ten people. Totally ripped the bodies apart. Police said that they were in this underground jail thing."
"How did they find the jail?" Frank asked.
"Someone who lived near it, complained about the smell. Like something had died and was rotting." He looked up at me. "It was only a mile away from our old house."
"Holy shit." I sighed. "Have they found the person who did it?"
Mikey shook his head, "not a single clue."
"That's crazy." Frank said. "Did they show the crime scene?"
Mikey shook his head again, "They said it was too graphic. Apparently there were guts spread all over the walls and body parts were sprawled all around."
I stood there in shock. Frank looked a little disturbed. I tried to think of something to lighten the conversation, when Mikey piped in again.
"We should watch a movie."
"What should we watch? Any suggestions, Frank?" I got up and finished my cigarette. When I finished I went straight to my movie cabinet. I turned towards him for an answer.
"Jaws? I like really shitty graphics."
"So do I." I smiled. He smiled back and I almost melted. I know I just met him and I sound childish when I say this, but there was something about this kid. He did seem shy, but that made all the more cuter. I was pretty sure he's straight though. Only time would tell.
______________

It was around 2 when Frank's mother called him to go back home. I was tired and had slept through the movie. I didn't wake up until I heard my mother trudging down the stairs, calling Frank.
"Gerard! Wake up and say good bye to our guest." She yelled.
"Mrs. Way, it's fine. I-"
"Frank, please, call me Donna." She said to him. She then looked at me, "Say good bye."
"Bye Frank."
"Bye Gerard. I'll see you around." He gave a small smile and then went up the stairs.
Once he was up the stairs, my mother shot me a nasty glare. "I swear Gerard I-" She stopped herself and simply shook her head and left.

I decided to go back to sleep. Mikey had already left and the credits for the movie were still playing. I turned on my phone and plugged it into my stereo. I made sure it blared and made the whole house shake and drifted into a peaceful sleep. The odd thing was, it was Frank's smile that I saw when I closed my eyes. And I didn't really mind.