Creation & Destruction [3] | Jasper Hale

-12-

How does one speak to the dead?

  The idea of her having a gift was causing a severe headache to crash onto Joanna, although she couldn't experience them anymore. Everyone in the coven knew of this, her ability. The separate pack (The Clearwater siblings), were cautious of her for both the factors that a) she was still a newborn and growing used to human blood and b) she could very possibly see their father. That took a toll on Leah especially, so much so that she explained,

  "I need a break. I love you with all my heart, but...it's too much."

  Which Joanna knew was understandable. In her own world, seeing her father again made her feel she was still dead. Possibly, she still was. Being immortal did mean you were dead since your heart was on pause. 

  Carlisle had explained before when Ethan was away with Rosalie and Emmett that her gift, though a rare one, was possible to possess. He, himself, had never met an immortal with her gift, but he immediately offered his help. Joanna was splendid about this, but she was also hesitant.

  She didn't know if she could handle it all: Seeing her old family. She didn't even know where her grandmother and biological father were. 

  That's how Joanna found herself in the back porch of the home, sitting in one of the wicker chairs alongside the doctor. Dressed in a pair of midnight-blue sweats and a black tank top, she fiddled with the strings of her pants, listening to Carlisle. He was staring into the sun that was slowly rising that morning, which was something Joanna was becoming used to. 

  Not being able to sleep. From the words of Riley, whom of which was keeping his distance because seeing her with red eyes was causing painful memories to surface, he explained, "The sun? Uh, well, it's strange to walk around this damn place for twenty-four hours and see it rise and fall every day. It's something you'll get used to...slowly and painfully. It'll remind you about this."

  "Shall we bring up ideas?" Carlisle asks, looking slightly embarrassed. She knew that he was frustrated with himself for not being able to help that much, but she still admired his help. At least she had some of it since the other members were clueless. She wasn't irritated by that, just feeling lost at sea. "I'm sorry that I don't know all that much."

  "You're perfectly fine," she tells him, assuring him with a small smirk. Her dark eyes moved away from him to fall to where her hands were. "But yeah, we should come up with ideas. Just no usual spooky stuff to contact my family. That shit - sorry for my language  is something I much rather not do." Curling her locks behind her ears, she sent a hesitant look to him to only find him looking back at the sun. 

  Then, he lets out a long breath. "I wasn't thinking about that since I know how you are. I suggest that we- you think of them. I know it will be difficult to think of those you have lost, but maybe if you try, they'll appear."

  "Do you think it'll be as simple as that?" Joanna questions, cautious of his first idea. Doing that seemed to easy. There was a feeling deep within her that made her wonder if there was some sort of trick to break in order to see the dead again. "Not that I'm skeptical of your idea, I'm just cautious. I'm cautious about everything lately."

  "And that's understandable," he explains to her, voice soothing. Her nerves were high soon softened as he spoke. "I get why you feel that way. This is a new life and learning that you have a gift makes you feel...unreal in a way. When Edward realized his own gift, he was traumatized. Everyone was smacking his brain around and it took time for him to control it."

  Stunned, she blinks a few times before saying, "Damn."

  Carlisle nods, not looking at her. "Indeed."