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.⋆｡⋆🌧️˚｡⋆｡˚☣˚｡⋆. ◟ ✦ I'm not really good at this whole people thing. ❞
HOW DO YOU LET SOMEONE KNOW that you care about them? Distance yourself. Ever since I had that epiphany moment last night, I've decided to keep a distance between Ras and me. The long walk to the next bunker left me thinking about it a lot.
I realized that no matter what I thought I knew about Ras, I only have known him for a couple of days. I was getting attached too fast. Being isolated and by myself for six years must have left me with some serious attachment issues. I liked him too much to be too overbearing. But as much as it hurts, the best option was to stay away.
This, however, was extremely hard. I kept seeing him and Beatrice eying each other. This made my blood boil. So I looked to the skies trying to stay calm. It was a lovely day. The sun shined on my skin, warming me. It felt heavenly.
I sighed. Being with this group for who knows how long makes me feel more like an outcast than before. First, I thought I was barging in on Ras and Simone. I didn't belong with them. Now I'm in this group where they act like I'm useless. Maybe I am. I want to know where I belong.
I shook my head, trying to erase those thoughts. The only thing I need to be focused on is finding my father. If he is alive, that is.
As soon as I finished that thought, I saw Lea fall.
"Ah, fuck!" she cried, tumbling to the ground.
"Martin!" Patrick yelled.
"What," he answered.
"Lea can't go on much longer."
I watched as Beatrice, Patrick, and Jean help Lea up. I bit my lip. Why should I care about these people when all they've ever done is, be assholes? I don't know why I care, but I do. I guess it's just human nature.
I turn away from them, looking to the front, seeing Simone and Martin talking. Accidentally, I look Ras in the eye. I could see something in them, but I couldn't tell what emotion. Whatever it was, it broke my heart to see. I tightened my grip on my backpack strap and walked past him without another glance.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
We were getting closer and only had to get past the river. I've tried to stay closer to the front to avoid Ras but drifted to the back since that didn't work. I guess walking from the end is worst because I see him and Beatrice talking. They walked close together. I felt that dark feeling come back to me. But before it took over, I saw Ras's foot go in a deep puddle.
