Back in Time [WMatsui fanfic]

Chapter 15

Two months later.

Rena walked into the entrance vestibule and retrieved her coat from the hanger, dressing up and slipping into her shoes. She shut her eyes close, as if to mentally prepare for what was to come. She felt a sudden shiver of apprehension. For the past two months, those visits had turned into a routine. Nevermind how fragile and shattered they always left her, for nothing in the world she would put an end to them. Rena was extracted from her thoughts by the sound of footsteps approaching. She took time to recompose herself and slowly glanced over her shoulder, making eye contact with Akane.

"Are you sure you don't want me to drive you?" Akane offered, conflicted. "I could come with you."

"Thank you, but I already called a taxi," Rena said, reminding her. "And you have to be at work in half an hour, remember?"

"I can afford to arrive a bit late," Akane said, with gentle insistence. "I don't have any important meeting this morning."

"Arrive late? What would the CEO think of her chief operating officer behaving in such a way?" Rena said, attempting a light, joking tone. Her friend didn't seem fooled by it. "Thank you, but..." she added in a weak murmur, a forced smile curving her mouth but not reaching her eyes. "I prefer to go alone."

Rena saw her hesitating, her mouth opening and closing as if she wished to add something, but she didn't say anything. Yes, she preferred being alone during those visits. Tears always fell with great ease, too hard to contain, and she refused to offer such a sight to her friends again. They had already witnessed her sorrow far too often for her liking. She wanted to retrieve a semblance of dignity.

When did she come out of her state of torpor and inactivity? It was hard to pinpoint the exact moment. At first, she went downstairs to share meals in common, returning to the darkness of her bedroom straight after. Progressively, she went out an hour, and two, slowly back to interacting with the other members of the household.

Alice, the family's domestic robot, had been the easiest to start with. Rena didn't feel ashamed to look like a mess in front of her. She patiently listened as Rena spoke. Her replies were always tainted with a certain innocence and naivety, characteristic of her robotic conception, but she never asked questions more than necessary. Rena felt comfortable in her presence; Alice was a simple but easy company.

Gaining confidence, Rena allowed herself to engage in conversations with Akane and Airi. A few minutes at first. As the weeks went on, it turned into an hour, then two. Conversations were light and trivial. Mostly non-important. But the renewed socialization enabled her to slowly come out of her shell. Shizuru, Akane and Airi's quiet and good-mannered daughter, occasionally took the initiative to engage a conversation with her, mostly to share her everyday life at school.

The only person Rena hadn't managed to interact with was her own distant daughter. During meals, Natsuki focused on her plate and barely said a word. When they found themselves in the same room, Rena sometimes caught her daughter staring at her. As soon as their eyes met, Natsuki looked away hastily.

Right now, as Rena finished preparing herself for her departure, and she observed the two children playing in the living room, her eyes suddenly locked with Natsuki's. Rena distinguished a flicker of hesitation in her expression. These last few weeks, it wasn't the first time she witnessed it. Her attitude had changed ever so slightly. She refused to talk to her, but the visual exchanges lingered, as if she was... torn? Yet, this time once more, the brief visual interaction ended as every previous one. Her daughter's reproachful and upset look: Rena would never get used to it. And it made her heart clench in pain every single time.