Silence

Twenty-Seven

With tear tracks on my face, I went to go see Dad. I didn't want to eat anything and I had to get ready for work. I walked into my room and found Pietro moving in and a bunk bed replaced my bed. "He's going to be rooming with you while you get better." Dad clapped me on the shoulder and tilted his head. "Why were you crying?" I shrugged his hand off my shoulder and walked into the bathroom. "Bad dream." I lied and pulled out a pair of sewing scissors. I cut the stitches off my stomach and pulled out the string. "When's my appointment with Sam?" I asked, looking at myself in the mirror. "At eleven." I hummed and finished cutting the stitching off. I reached into my closet and grabbed a long sleeve shirt. "Okay, I've got to go to work." I muttered and pulled my suit from the closet. "Pete that doesn't count as work." Dad protested and I smiled softly. "It does when Boss wants pictures of Spiderman." Dad laughed and waved me off. "Don't be late to your meeting!" He called after me and I whistled to tell him I got it.

I stepped into the garage, finding Sam, Bucky and Steve. I tightened the strapping of my camera around my head. I should really invest in a bag or a pocket big enough to carry shit like this around. "Peter I think you need some more time before you go out saving lives." Sam said absentmindedly. "Sorry man, my boss wants pictures of Spiderman and Boss gets what he wants." I hopped onto my bike and tore out of the garage.

"Peter there is a fire on fourth. Reports of kids stuck in the basement." I cursed and swung in that direction. I got there in record time and tossed a news reporter the camera. "Do me a favor and hold onto that." The guy caught it and grinned. I ran into the house and found the stairs going down easily. They were slick with something and I hoped that it wasn't gasoline. "Hello!" I shouted and immediate screams responded. I ran into the blazing room and found two kids, one maybe fourteen and the other a few months old. "Okay, kid hop on my back. I got the baby." The teen did as told and I took the baby, cradling their face in my neck. "Hold on tight." I ran up the steps and out into the hot house. I slid out the door and was thrown forward with the thrust of the house imploding. I curled into a ball, taking the teen into my arms and saving the baby. We landed on the concrete and I skidded to a stop. I straightened out and found that both kids were okay. "Oh thank God!" One of the fire fighters shouted and I stood up, the baby in my arms. The teen took the baby from me and thanked me profusely. "No problem." The reporter handed me my camera with a smile and I swung off.

"Peter you've got a call from Sammy." Karen answered it and I came to a stop in front of my bike. "Hey Sam, I'm coming." I breathed out, coughing slightly. I inhaled a lot of smoke and my suit is sort of burnt in some places. I probably have some first degrees. "You better be." He hung up and I gunned it down Fourth and took a hard right. I came to a stop at the VA building and pulled off helmet. I changed just short of Sam's call and made a run for it. I ran inside and Sam smiled, taking my arm, to which I winced. We got into the room and I pulled off my leather jacket. I checked my arms and huffed at the burns littered about. "What happened?" He questioned, handing me a water bottle. "Fire, kids trapped in basement. House exploded as soon as I stepped outside. Both are okay, but I got the brunt of it."

I sat down and set my camera on the table. "Clint said you were crying this morning. Bad dreams?" I winced and shook my head and leaned into the couch. "Natasha took Sage." Sam's face fell and he cursed. "I'm sorry. Are you okay?" I shrugged and closed my eyes. "I lost them once, May hadn't wanted a kid with problems, problems like what she said Sage had. When Ben passed, she took that as an opportunity to put them back up. Now, I lost them because I'm unstable." I shrugged again and sighed, rubbing the burns on my arm. I looked at Sam and he wrote something down. "I want to do a sort of test. See where you are." I nodded slowly, not sure what he was playing at.

"Okay I'm going to say a word and I want you to say the first thing that pops into your head." I nodded again, closing my eyes and laying across the couch. "Family." "Avengers." I answered immediately and heard the scratch of a pen. "Siblings." "S-Sage." I mumbled. I always looked forward to seeing them when I got home. They would always give me big hugs. "Hospital." "Comfort." Anytime I woke up in a hospital bed or room, I always knew I was going to make it to the next day. "Sex." "Forced." I squeezed my eyes shut and images of Wade popped into my brain. I flinched and sat up, opening my eyes. I pressed my palms flat into my eyes, trying to not cry. "Coffee." "Fear." That was where Wade liked to do a lot of his abuse. That damned coffee shop. "Men." "Intimidating." I knew from a young age that I was gay, but after Wade, I never wanted to pursue that part of myself. He robbed me of any new experiences with a person of the same sex.
"Spiderman." I didn't answer. I wasn't sure how to. "Peter?" I looked at Sam and he gave me an expectant look. "Weak. Unfit. Pathetic. Broken. You want me to keep going?" I breathed out. I felt like I was choking and my chest was collapsing.

Sam slid out of his chair and walked towards me, his hands up to show that he wasn't a threat. "Peter breathe." He sank down in front of me, putting his hands on my knees. I tried to force air into my lungs and I only gasped. "Peter you need to take slow breaths. You're going to pass out." I tried to do as he said and after a few minutes, it slowly got better. "W-What wa-was that-t?" I gasped out and Sam stood up, handing me my water bottle. "An anxiety attack, a pretty severe one at that. Its common with the type of PTSD you look to have." Sam sat back down and I leaned back into the couch, furiously wiping away my tears. "What did you see? You looked to be having a flashback of some sort." I sighed and rubbed my hands on my pants. "I just kept seeing him pop up in my head. That stupid face he would make when I would try and fight back. It's like he knew that no matter what, he had me right where he wanted me. No matter how much I tried to fight, say no or even tell him that I would go to the police, he always seemed to weasel his way back in. The threats were never ending and they came in all forms. He would show up outside the Compound. He would text and call relentlessly. He would threaten Sage. I don't even know how he found out they lived with us. He just knew my entire life better than I did. Like he had been watching me the entire time."