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chapter two

emma's pov

i wake up at 10am, and liv's still asleep. i cook up some breakfast and make coffee. i went back to my room to wake olivia and i see she's on her phone scrolling on social media. 

"hey," i say. she looks at me and smiles. she gets up and puts her face in her head. "i'm sorry," she mumbles. i go to her and say it's okay. 

"there's breakfast," i say.

"thanks, em," she stays where she is. finally she asks, "can i have a shower?" 

i tell her yes and i get her a towel. she gets in the bathroom and i get out some clothes to lend her. i look for a pair of new underwear (i know i have them somewhere), and i find a box of sealed ones inside one of my drawers. welp, that should do. 

i put the clothes on my bed and go back down to the kitchen. it was on my plan to vlog today but seeing as olivia is in a pit, i'd have to film it another time. a few minutes later and she goes down, hair in a towel. 

"eat up bitch," i say. 

the thing with olivia is she's a quiet person, but also very loud. she's not like me, who's very loud and wild. liv is like... loud but not loud-loud. i don't even know what i'm saying. anyway, liv was quiet when she ate, and it's a good thing i decided to play music before she came so the kitchen wouldn't drown in silence. i eat too, and when we've both finished liv gets my plate and cleans up. i tried to say no, but she just smiles and i let her be. 

"so," she says, after she finishes cleaning up.

"hmm, spill," i say. i tried to be supportive here without being pushy, and i guess it worked?

"so, ellie," she says. 

"hmm, ellie,"

"we broke up." 

"what happened?" i stood, deciding we should talk this over some coffee.

"well, el and i decided to film a video at her house, and when we finished i asked to eat out and we did, and since the bay area was close, we went there,"

"you drove?"

"no, we got our separate cars 'cause i planned on going at your place afterwards," she says. "we did eat, and when i've finished, ellie just suddenly became weird and... zoned out. finally, she launched into a long talk about how lucky she was that she was able to be with me for this long," at this point, i've finished the coffees and she's tearing up, so she sips some coffee before continuing, "and then she says that lately, she's been thinking about our future, and if we would really last. at this point i was mad and scared and she said that she was sorry that she had to break the news out like this and i ask, "what news? that you don't believe in us anymore?" and she says "no, that i'm breaking up with you," and like... em, we spent literally the whole day together and we were happy and shit and i haven't even noticed any sign that she was doubting and she didn't even explain it thoroughly, and i'm... i don't know,"

silence followed, and then she started talking again.

"after that i rushed out of the restaurant and to philz, and she followed me, but i told her to get the fuck out of my face, and i was crying already so i entered philz and left her outside. i ordered coffee and when i turned my back, she wasn't outside anymore, and i got outside as fast i humanly could and i broke down there. and then, i called you,"

"wow, that was... oh liv, i'm sorry,"

"that's fine, em,"

"no really, i'm-- fuck, what happens now?"

"i don't know, i don't really feel like living," she says, sipping coffee.

"oh i know," i say, standing up. "let's get your car."