Stars glimmered above as StarClan cats, known for their wisdom and excellent articulation (they're at least a fourth grade level; crazy, right?) gathered around a star-shaped kitty pool and looked in. Suddenly, strange cats who looked exactly like the cats looking in appeared in the water, copying their every breaths like a bunch of weirdo freaks.
"Omg dooooooooooodz, I think those radical manz from the evil mirror dimension or whatevahz are totes gonna give us the lowdown about a gnarly prophcy or somethin' 'bout my bodacious long lost daughter n' stuff who I was totally forced to give up n' stuff by some whack jerkoz out of plot convenience n' junk to some bodacious forbidden couple!" the blue one gasped, rudely interrupting the reflections.
The reflections didn't speak, most likely waiting passive aggressively for the rude blue cat, whose blue fur and constant obsession with mirror-cat conspiracies relating to star-shaped inflatable pools made it only obvious that her name must've been Bluestar, to shut up.
"We already know you're better than us at everything, including incredibly extensive plot exposition, being my mate so our ship name can be BluexRed and our purple child can make even the slightest bit of sense, and professional/competitive cooking (not including your unexplainable fear of boiling stuff for some weird reason), so there's no need to rub it in," the dark tortoiseshell tom with a distinct bushy, bright red tail, who, if I had to guess, I'd have to assume for obvious reasons that his name was none other than Oakheart, meowed in response, twitching his feathered ears in annoyance.
"Fyi bby, b careful or whatevz, u totes might accidentally use up all da 2 sentences ur allowed 2 say per book."
"You're right, sorry."
"Cool, das da spirit! BTdubz, da prophcy says that some mysterious, nevr b4 heard of star related cat is gonna get rid of holly bushez and tigerz forever or somethin' like that."
"Wot in da world could dis prophcy mean?" A white tom who I can only assume is the only relevant dead white tom in the entire series, Snowkit, gasped.
"Wut a complete mystery dat we might nvr evr solve! We got 2 tell Jfeather rn!" The golden tom, who I'm guessing from context clues was most likely tragically unnamed at birth, exclaimed.
Everyone turned and stared at R- Oakheart in silence.
"Well, dood? R u gonna sayz NEthing 2?" asked probably Bluestar, who then added in absolute, 100% seriousness, "C@ got ur tongue?"
Probably Oakheart rolled his eyes. He wanted to tell Bluestar she made a bad pun...
But he couldn't.
ESTÁS LEYENDO
Starstar's Star + Friends/Rewrote Starkit to make it WORSE than before ;P
FanfictionI'VE DONE IT. I SOMEHOW FOUND A WAY TO REWRITE STARKIT'S PROPHECY TO BE EVEN WORSE THAN BEFORE. Everyone's rewriting Starkit's prophecy to improve it, but to try to make it worse is a REAL challenge. I think I made the cut. Okay but seriously, t...
