chapter 39: no more secrets

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I got to go home today, my mom has been crying and apologizing a lot. She felt awful for everything, she felt even worse when I told her how long it had been going on. Although it was either I tell her, or the police would. She was shocked at how well I hid it, all the time. Everyone was shocked at how well I hid it.
We walked through the door, and Lily ran to me; I hugged her. She went up to my room with me. “Em, Are you okay?” Lily asked. “Yea, I’m fine.” I said, We heard a knock at the door. “Yea.” I said, “Hey, hun, I’m making your favorite-”
“We get meatloaf, YES!” Lily said happily running to her room. “Em, We can change up your room, if you want or anything you want.” She smiled, trying not to cry. “It’s fine mom, you don’t have to do anything special for me.” I said,
“Okay, I’ll call you when dinner is ready. I’ll be downstairs if you need me.” I nodded, she left. I looked around the room, I now feel a stranger in.

Around seven, we had dinner. It was awkward but the second I was done, I headed up to my room. I put some music on and grabbed a book.

******
It was now Monday, they released the stories in the paper this week, about my father, and Rick. I wore Black leggings, and a hoodie, not really wanting to even try. “Hun, you don’t have to go in today.”
“Yea, I do, I have that test today. Remember?” She laughed a little, “I suppose you do, if it gets too hard just come home, alright?” I nodded and she left.
I met up with Jack by my locker. I heard whisperings of the kids, as I walked down the hall ‘I heard she made it up’ I heard one say. ‘I heard she did it with her dad’ another kid said. That was only half of them, others were much worse.. “Hey, I thought you weren’t coming in today.” Jack said. “I know, but I had that test. And I didn’t want to stay home. God don’t these people have something better to do other than stare and judge.” I said,
“Hey.” I heard a voice behind me, I turned around. “Hey, Abby, what’s up?”

“Listen, I’m so so so so so sorry, I was such a bitch to you and, most importantly, I wasn’t there for you like I should’ve been, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” I said,
“Forgive me?” she said longonly. “Of course.” I said and pulled her into a tight hug. “Oh, that’s the bell.”
Jack said. Jack and I walked in class hand in hand. We went through our day, when lunch rolled around, everyone stared at me, still whispering, as if I didn’t have ears.
“You okay?” Jack asked. “Yea, fine. Just wishing they would stop being stupid, and stop whispering.” I said,

“ATTENTION!” Abby said standing on the table. “Abbs, what are you doing?” I said trying to get her off the table. “IF ANY OF YOU, SAY ANOTHER WORD ABOUT MY FRIEND, I WILL HAVE YOU EXPELLED!” she said everyone shut up.  “Perks of being the principal’s daughter.” She said sitting back down. “That was really unnecessary. But thank you.” I said, trying not to laugh. “It was highly necessary.” she said. We finished eating, and we headed to the library. “Emma, if you ever need to talk, I’m here.” the librarian said.
“Thanks,” I said and took a seat.
“Like I would ever talk to a teacher,”
“You look like you want to kill someone.” Jack said. “Don’t she always?” Abby piped in, more a statement than a question.
“She’s not wrong. But I’m fine, I just don’t like people staring at me. Or noticing me.” I said, Abby gave me a look. “Abbs, don’t.” I giggled, “Fine.” she said.

The bell rang for us to go to class, we headed to fourth period dreadfully. Although, before we knew it, the day was over. “Hey, Em, wanna hangout?” Abby said, I haven’t been doing much of anything with Abby since I came back to school, from what happened with Rick. “sure, sounds fun.” I said, Jack came up behind Abby. “What are we talking about?” He said, scaring her. “Hanging out.” I said shutting my locker. “Sounds fun.” He said catching up to me and Abby. “Fine, you can come.” Abby said. “I don’t think he was asking.” I smirked as I glanced at Abby.

We got in our cars, and drove to the local diner we always went to. We ordered something to eat and spent the rest of the time talking.  After about an hour Abby said she had to go, leaving me alone with Jack. she mouthed the words, ‘you got this’ We laughed a bit, “She does realize we can see her right?” I said, “I don’t think she cares.” Jack said. We paid the waiter and went to the park.
“You okay?” Jack asked sitting on the swing. “Yea, just never imagined I would go home from school and something not happen. It’s nice, not having that constant worry.” I said, His phone rang. He answered then said he had to go. “Bye, talk to you later.” he said walking to his car. About an hour after he left I finally went home.

I walked into my house having some small talk with my mother, before heading to my room to study for upcoming tests. I heard a knock on my door. “Yea.” I said, “Hey,” my mom said, “hey” I said as I paused my music. “How was school today?” she asked sitting on my bed. “Fine, I guess.”
“You guess?” I nodded. “What happened?” she asked.
“People were whispering things, spreading rumors, just a lot of talk and stares. That’s all. Abby took her position as the principal's daughter to threaten people.” I said sitting up. “Alright, dinner will be done shortly.” She said standing by the door. “Okay.” I said, She walked out of the room. I went back to the music I was originally listening to.

Once I was done studying I took a long shower. After I got out, I got dressed in black leggings and a black shirt. It was only six-thirty, mom called me down for dinner. I ate quickly then went back to my room for bed. I grabbed the book I had been reading; but got distracted.
Is all this my fault? Is it because of how I dress? NO, it’s their fault. Not mine. No matter how many times I or anyone else said that it was their fault not mine, I believed it was.

I thought to myself every now and then. I eventually went to sleep knowing I  would wake up in the middle of the night screaming, shaking, and crying. I hated nightmares, I felt like a kid when I had them. Mainly because my mom would come in and hug me and tell me everything's okay. Like she would if I were little.
That’s what I hated most.

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