𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 ☽

✯ chapter IX

ELEANORA

   "you want me to what?!"

   "sleep with oliver" i told him simply, i knew what i was suggesting was wrong but if he still feels the same way after sleeping with him then i can let that slide. they love each other but i can't keep playing the claim game with my brother. "and look, i'm not forcing you because you want to"

elio paced our room, i felt sick. what i was asking of him was and is sick but i needed to know where i stood. after our kiss last night the cogs in my mind haven't stopped turning and the feeling of uncertainty was starting to mess with me.

"okay, but not because you asked me to but because i want to" he said before leaving the room and the sick feeling started to subside.

i stayed in my room writing until my mother called me down, i paced down the stairs and into the lounge to see the leather coated man stood in the middle of the room with the same admiration in his eyes from years ago. he turned and engulfed me in cologne and his heavy arms as he placed a kiss on my nose.

my mother held an expression of uncertainty but the smile i flashed her seem to ease her as she left antonio and i alone. "i told you to stay away, if my father sees you-"

"-actually. he welcomed me" his thick spanish accent sent goosebumps down my skin, "i see the american isn't around?"

i stepped back slightly, "please don't talk about oliver in that way, he's very smart and he's kind" i took his hand in mine and lead him out into the garden and to the china tree situated a few yards from the patio.

"i replay that night over and over again eleanora and if you really want me to go then i just want to say one thing. i would never of hurt you, you meant-mean so much to me and i could never place a hand on you like that" he had never shown me this vulnerability, i almost felt sorry for him but his words seemed to be poisoned and not entirely true.

i didn't say anything since there was nothing to be said, accusations were no use. they would get us nowhere, i want our past to be behind us. whether it was my fears getting the better of me or my instincts knowing that he couldn't be trusted at that moment.

i found his hand on my thigh, not moving, just respectfully sitting there as if it was waiting for my next move. looking into his green eyes i so wanted to replace them with oliver's ocean eyes. to replace his dark, gelled hair with oliver's fluffy blonde mop.

but at the same time, there were aspects of antonio i would like to see more in oliver. like the way his hands are rough, not soft but when they touch you the friction gives you shivers or the way that ant says my name with extra emphasis on the e's.

"what do you want to do?" he asked me, his lips getting dangerously close to my neck.

"mafalda has made dinner, would you like to stay?" i asked and he nodded hesitantly, when we sat at the table and mafalda noticed our hands linked together causing her eyebrows to raise.

she knew. she always knew, it was her gift. after antonio left the first time, she went out every morning and picked me fresh blueberries to wake up to so instead of tears, my face was filled with joy.

we sat for a while talking until oliver and elio graced us with their presence, oliver seemed to brush past my company next to me but elio took an opposing approach.

"what the fuck-" he went to punch antonio, "-are you doing here?!" he shouted and grabbed the collar of his jacket.

"elio stop" i pleaded as papa calmed down my twin, guilt washed over me as elio's face turned a crimson red as he let go of his jacket, "ant, i think it's better you go"

i pulled him up and he followed me to the gate, "meet me in crema tomorrow, i want to take you out"

"no, i don't think i will" the logic was there and the reasoning was definitely there, "you're bad for me and for my family, it was great seeing you but this" i guestured to the space between us, "is wrong for many reasons"

he just nodded and looked as if he was about to say something but just left. no goodbye, oh god how i wishes for a goodbye. my eyes filled with tears as i sat back down at the table, it was deafeningly quiet.

i passed my foot over oliver's ankle and he jerked as if he was repulsed by the action, he got up and wiped his mouth before nodded towards my parents and giving us the most emotionless and cold "later" so far on his visit.

now that wasn't the goodbye i longed for.

A/N

hi!!!
wow writers block is hitting hard at the moment but i just wanted to thank you for over 600 reads!! that is incredible so thank you :) once again, i hope everyone is well and okay through this difficult time.

if you have any suggestions on plot ideas or just general improvements then please suggest them, anything is greatly appreciated.

thank you so so much for your support